[Fic] Reminisce

[nilielh]

Title : Reminisce 33.1
Rating : R
Pairing : Ohno/Nino
Disclaimer : fiction yo!
Summary : Volume 2 - Nino was done reminiscing and had finally found the courage to let go. But then the same person who had disappear from his life came back and Nino again found himself stuck between the past he had desperately tried holding on to and the present that gave him nothing but false hope.

 

Nino was still sobbing  against the crook of his neck by the time he guided them both back inside his house and Ohno couldn’t hold back a chuckle, patting the younger man’s shoulder soothingly at the same time.

He knew they could never take back the years they’ve spent apart no matter how much he wanted to, no matter how much he wanted to. Even the pain he had stupidly put the both of them through just because he wasn’t brave enough then to fight for what he knew was right; he told Nino exactly that with which the younger man fiercely contradicted by kissing him hard on the mouth the second after he uttered them.

He dropped a kiss on Nino’s temple, feeling the younger man’s warm breath against his skin and the slight trembling of Nino’s body. It was all too surreal; everything he had been dreaming about for the last couple of years had finally became a reality in just a blink of an eye and though a part of him still wouldn’t want to believe this was all happening, he couldn’t stop himself from smiling stupidly as final bits of relief and happiness settled in.

“Stop crying,” he murmured through Nino’s hair, his voice shaking slightly when Nino’s fingers gripped tightly at his arms, sniffing as he shuddered against him. “Kazu, please~” he added hoarsely, his chest tightening at the emotions swelling helplessly inside him. Holding the younger man tighter against him, Ohno couldn’t help but feel all the more happy with the way Nino clung unto him as if he was afraid he would disappear any second.

He guided them both inside his bedroom, with Nino practically molded against his body; he tried lifting Nino’s face but Nino stubbornly refused by letting out a muffled growl, burying his face further down his chest. Ohno gave up and pushed them both to the bed; Nino ended up sprawled half on top of him as he settled one hand down the small of Nino’s back and the other brushing light touches all over Nino’s arm.

“I’m here,” he said after a long moment when Nino’s hold loosened a little bit. “I’m not going anywhere, okay?” he grumbled huskily, letting out a soft laugh when Nino pinched his hip. “Just saying that for you to at least let go… we’re on the bed now, Kazu, come on…” he added teasingly, squeaking when Nino pinched him again.

“Kazu,”

Another choked sob followed by a garbled word of some sort, which sounded like a muffled version of his name against the skin of his neck and Nino lifted his face, his eyes shining with tears as he gazed back at the face of the man he was still madly in love with. Ohno knew that look on Nino’s eyes far too well as he tried swallowing back a sob, cupping Nino’s cheek tenderly. Nino closed his eyes for a fleeting second, his lips trembling slightly as he leaned in to be kissed which Ohno happily obliged. They kissed slowly; their lips barely touching and yet Ohno felt as if something inside him cracked the minute Nino muffled a sob through his mouth, his hands wounding around his neck and pulling him closer at the same time.

Nino drew back a few seconds after, his eyes glimmering at the edges while he stared at Ohno and Ohno did his best not to break down at the pain he saw in those eyes.

“You shouldn’t have kept those things from me, Satoshi,” Nino started, clearing his throat as he did so. Ohno nodded quietly, pressing another kiss at the side of Nino’s jaw and closing his eyes because the weight of Nino’s stare was just too much... way too much. “ – if you had told me everything then, this wouldn’t have happened. I would have left with you or something.. I would have ~”

Ohno placed a finger over Nino’s bruised lips before he proceeded on stroking Nino’s cheek lovingly. “ – it doesn’t matter anymore, Kazu…” he mumbled, leaning in to kiss the tip of Nino’s nose, giggling quietly when Nino leaned forward and started nosing his cheek in return. “the only thing that’s important is that everything’s out in the open now. I’m sorry for being such a coward, for not facing you the first time and behaving like a total bastard; the first thing I should have done was to apologize but I didn’t and I’m sorry… I’m so sorry…”

A beat and Nino looked up, gazing straight into his eyes. There were a lot of questions lingering on them, things Ohno would have wanted to just bury into the deep corners of his being but he knew he couldn’t; not if he wanted things to go back the way it used to between the two of them, although that thought, in reality, would actually take a lot more hard work, most especially in his part.

He was the one who hurt Nino after all.

“Are you sorry for marrying her too?” Nino asked in a tone filled with uncertainty, his eyes gazing at him through all the hazy, unspoken loneliness and Ohno wanted nothing but to take those all away; if only he could bring back the hands time… if only he could.

“No,” Ohno answered; his voice soft and steady, wincing at the same time Nino very subtly sucked in a sharp breath. He could very well lie about it, just to spare Nino at least a little bit of heart ache he had given him enough in the past. But he couldn’t; he simply couldn’t for the simple fact that marrying her was probably the only right thing he did in his life.

Nino looked vaguely shocked but he had successfully hid it by pursing his lips, or so he thought. Ohno knew that gesture very well; they may have spent years apart from each other but those wouldn’t easily erased all of those memories they made together and the fact that they spent their growing up years following each other’s tail made it easier for him to identify that subtle movement, including their ability to read each other’s actions without much of a second thought. And Ohno knew well how that single word rocked Nino’s world and crumpled his hopes into tiny little pieces.

He wasn’t able to hold back a chuckle, tightening his hold around Nino who then started peeling his hands away, the younger man’s lips pursed into a thin line.

“Will you let me explain first Kazu?” Ohno muttered, dropping a kiss at the side of Nino’s jaw which Nino replied with a hiss. Ohno was well aware how stubborn Nino could if he wanted to be but he also knew damn well how insecure he was now, most especially with regards to this still unresolved issue standing in between them. “ – you wouldn’t understand if you won’t let me explain, Kazunari..” he said, placing one hand at the back of Nino’s head to keep him in place before his mouth moved to nip the corners of Nino’s mouth. “Please?” he followed huskily, sighing in relief when Nino muffled a whimper before he tilted his head and allowed Ohno’s lips into his, moaning Ohno’s name when Ohno boldly swiped his tongue over Nino’s bottom lip. They sighed heavily through each other’s mouth, their tongues braiding together in a rhythm only their hearts could hear. And when Ohno pulled back, a little out of breath, he smiled when he realized Nino was too as he gently pressed their foreheads together while he massaged the nape of Nino’s neck.

“Did you love her?” Nino asked after a while, his voice sounded pained and a little too far away from Ohno’s ears that he had to literally look up to check if the voice he just heard really did belong to Nino. With another chuckle, he smiled and nodded, kissing the top of Nino’s head when the younger man stiffened against him. He knew he was deliberately hurting Nino by doing this but he couldn’t find it in him to lie about what Faye meant to him.

He took a deep breath, pulling Nino closer and moving his lips against Nino’s left ear; he felt the younger man shivered despite his obvious attempt on keeping a straight face and Ohno badly wanted to take them all back if only to make things easier for Nino. With a deep suffering sigh, Ohno whispered;

“But not as much as I love you, Kazunari…”


To : Volume 2 - Chapter 33 part 2