In Time

[nilielh]

Title : In Time – 15 Final
Rating : R
Pairing : Ohno/Nino
Genre : Angst. Romance
Disclaimer : fiction, yo!
Summary : Where I came from, Leader’s gone. He’s dead. Buried six feet under the ground where I can no longer reach him. Where you can no longer reach him. You want to know why I’m here? Well then, there’s your answer.
Note : based on a very old Meme Prompt - Future!Nino is from 2 years in the future. Lots of Future!Nino pissing present day Nino off. I’m not even sure if I did this right but I guess it's alright as long as there’d be lots of pissing, though with lots of angst, too. So sorry for that.

It’s a little too late to be thinking about the ‘what ifs’, of the ‘what could have beens’ when said things happened while he was too consumed with anger and jealousy to even properly account his actions because, well, it’s done… finished. Nothing he say or do now is going to make a difference, at least where it involves Ohno because.

Because he knows he fucked up. Spectacularly so that the simple fact that he is here with them, sitting quietly with the other four, with Ohno so close yet so far for him to touch is making his head spin, and all his other vital parts hurt in ways he never thought possible.

He’s not even sure how they were able to coax Ohno to come with them. Or who had managed to convince Ohno to leave his burning apartment, not to mention future-Nino behind, because it doesn’t matter so long as they were able to. He also doesn’t remember who decided to take them back to Aiba’s place instead of taking them back to Jun’s, or his own because he’s too wound up to even care, too caught up with his own guilt to even decide anything, for himself and for anyone else.

Everyone is quiet save from the low sounds coming from the television. Jun and Sho are both standing at the opposite sides of the living room, talking in hushed tones on their phones. The three of them – himself, Leader and Aiba-chan are on the couch, staring at the television as if it would magically show something about what had happened earlier that evening but even now, an hour and a half since, nothing new has yet to be reported.

Aiba-chan sits in between him and Ohno but even despite the distance, he can feel Ohno’s misery as if it is his own. It’s unbearable to be sitting here doing nothing, to be around the person who means the world to him while the said person doesn’t even spare him a glance as if he is not there.

He looks down and stares at his hands while the reporter on TV is saying something about the earlier incident which he is no longer paying attention to.

Next to him, Aiba shifts when Ohno does, too, throwing his long arm over their Leader’s shoulders and tugging the older man close to him, closer than Ohno normally allows but doesn't comment on it this time around. He won't because his eyes are still somehow glued on the screen, his face marred with pain that he himself probably won't ever be able to comprehend, no matter how hard he wants to. He's not the one who lost someone here, afterall, even though it does feel like a big chunk of himself had been taken out of him the minute he realized future-Nino was gone.

On the screen, another person is reporting  the recovery of two bodies on the apartment unit where the fire allegedly started, stating Ohno's apartment floor and the unit next to Ohno's - one male and one female - both dead.
Mariko Sora-san, 25, single, who works as Personal Assistant to Yamamoto Pharmaceutical's Managing Director's son, Kotaro Yamamoto, is found dead along with the Director's son himself. It is said that the two are having an illicit affair ....

Two bodies?

Then what about -

His stomach is in knots and the painful twist in his gut feels like it’s going to stay no matter how hard he tries to shove it away. He chances a glance to his right and finds that the expression on Ohno's face hadn't changed, and he is still clutching the hem of his own shirt like it's his only lifeline.

The painful twist in his gut increases tend folds, as he stands up and goes straight to the door without another word.

+++

Someone is quick to follow him before he manages another three steps outside the door.

It is Sho. “You’re not thinking of going back to Leader’s place, are you?”

He says nothing for about two minutes, doesn't bother turning around despite stopping dead on his tracks before he mumbles, “That’s actually not a bad idea –“

“Nino –“

“- but no,” he says, cutting Sho off as quickly as he can manage it. “I’m… I’m heading home,” he breathes, wishes his voice doesn’t come out shaky, the same way the rest of him is, biting the inside of his cheeks just to keep himself from bursting into tears right then and there.

“Nino, don’t be like this,” Sho tells him, like it is that easy. Like everything is going to be alright after everything that has happened, that he'll be able to unhear the words Ohno had said right to his face, that he'll be able to unsee the pain written all over Ohno's eyes when their gazes meet, because he won't.

“I have to get out of here – away from Leader, away from all of these, Sho-chan,”  he bites out, shoulders shaking with all the emotion he is trying hard to rein in. It’s difficult enough to wrap his head around the fact that another man is dead, even though that man is technically he himself, too, but it is a hundred times harder to accept that he is the one being blamed for it.

“Nino –“

“I have to go,” he says, voice trembling now along with the rest of him, still refuses to turn around because he doesn’t want to see the same thing written all over Sho’s face. Because he knows, even without them saying it, that they blame him for what happened to future-Nino. And well, he couldn’t exactly  blame them. It was his fault, afterall, all of it was his own damn fault and he knows it.

“I have to go, I’m sorry,” he says, feels the first warm trail of his tears against his cheek the minute he starts to walk away, but stops when another voice decides to join in the conversation.

"Go where?" says the voice, and he should be ashamed with how easily he succumbed to his tears at the sound of that voice, but finds that he's not, not really. He turns to find Ohno standing there, his back against the wall next to the door, his arms crossed tightly over his chest.

"L-Leader,"

"So you're leaving, too? The same way the other one did? What the hell is this? What kind of fucked up thing is this, tell me?" Ohno says, mouth twisting bitterly at the edges. "because I don't fucking understand it, Nino,"

"O-Ohno-san -" he stutters, vaguely paying attention to Sho who stands there looking torn, before Sho decides to leave.

"And if this is what the end is supposed to be, you - him -  should have just left me there to die if all I'll get is this - whatever the hell is this, after all that fucking fuss because I don't want any of it," Ohno says, calmly, like he means it and he finds himself stepping forward only to be stopped when Ohno holds out a hand at him. "I was okay with dying, you know? I've accepted it, to be honest, but one of you had to come and rescue me, and now that person is gone because of me. And now you're leaving, too, what, because you think it's my fault that he's -"

"What?" he hisses, confused for a second until his gaze found Ohno's, and everything sort of click into place without him realizing it. He crosses the short distance between them and grasps Ohno's arms, tugging the older man to him. "Stop it, oh my god, what are you even saying?"

Ohno, he realized, is shaking so badly when he folds his arms around Ohno's body, the strong scent of smoke lingers when he ducks down to bury his nose against the crown of Ohno's head.

"I wasn't able to save the future you, Nino," Ohno mumbles to his chest, and his own clenches painfully at the misery riding Ohno's tone. "and I'm scared, I really am," Ohno breathes, fingers clutching the front of his shirt. "What is going to happen to you if he's dead? What if you - what if -"

He closes his palm tenderly against the base of Ohno's skull and presses his lips against the side of Ohno's temple, wondering how it's possible that they're both worrying over the same thing despite not knowing it.

Suddenly, there are images in his head that he knows aren't his to begin with, but he knows they're his to own, now... memories that he knows he will cherish no matter who Ohno shared them with. He closes his eyes and utters a silent prayer to whoever has decided to send his future-self back here to the present.

"What is there to be scared of, Leader?" he murmurs into Ohno's hair, his chest filled with emotions he can hardly contain. He runs his palm across the firm plane of Ohno's back before worming his arms around Ohno and squeezing Ohno with all he has. "I'm here, I'm safe - you are, too, and that's because my future-self is braver than any version of me will ever be. I'm sure he's not dead, because I'm still here, I'm still alive,"

Ohno rubs his nose against his throat and the gesture is equally charming as it is endearing.

"What?"

Ohno smiles against his skin and he swears he can feel it seeping down to his bones.

"Maybe you're right,"

"I am, trust me," he says, and reaches up to cradle the back of Ohno's head, holding it in place, before he lets his fingers round the way down to Ohno's jaw. "I love you," he murmurs, then, "and I'm sorry for not being able to get to you on time. I guess I owe my future-self a whole lot for taking care of you for me, for being there to get you out of harm's way when I wasn't there to do it myself,"

Ohno shakes his head and leans up to be kissed, which he wholeheartedly gave in to. The kiss is chaste, soft and tender, his fingers curled around Ohno's jaw just as tenderly.

"That was you, Nino," Ohno tells him, "the braver and definitely better version of you that I couldn't wait to meet, but it's you just the same. And you're right... he won't exist if you don't so I guess I just have to look forward to the day that I'd get to meet him again,"

"What do you mean?" he asks, a tad confused.

Ohno pulls away and fishes his phone out of his pocket, sliding his thumb across the screen to unlock it. Then without another word, he lifts it up close to his face.

"What's this?" he asks, squinting at the message written there. Ohno smiles.

"Message from your future self, what else?"

It reads.

If you're alive (well, that would be awesome, thanks to my awesome self, then) and is reading this, come find me on the day of my birthday, two years from now.

I will be waiting for you.

I love you, Satoshi.


He smiles and takes Ohno's face in hand. "Well, I guess that's a date, then?"

Ohno nods. "It's a date,"


+++


He opens his eyes to a very familiar sight, jerking up as if he’d been electrocuted. He looks around, shocked, heart pounding hard through his ribcage he is suddenly afraid about dying of heart failure when he remembers something.

He is up on his feet in a flash, the memories of the earlier events feels like they are ingrained at the back of his eyelids, though now, as he looks around the familiar sight of his apartment, he wonders if all of it had been nothing but a dream.

“Nino, you here?” he calls out, not even the slightest bit incredulous about calling his own name as he walks away from the couch, feeling like his heart is well on its way up his throat, making it difficult for him to breath air back into his lungs. He is shaking so bad his legs threaten to give out on him, vaguely wishing for his own voice to answer back no matter how ridiculous it all seem to be.

A minute, then two passes, but there’s nothing. There’s only silence, save from the noises of his own heart thumping crazily underneath his ribcage.

“Hey asshole, I know you’re in there!” he half-yells, ducking down to grab his phone lying innocently next to his discarded console and walking barefoot towards the  bedroom. “Ninomiya!”

He grips the phone and raises his hand to squint at it before swiping to unlock the screen, feeling like all his strength had been robbed out of him, moisture gathering at the corners of his eyes when he sees the time and date on the screen itself.


17 June 2017
Saturday
9:22 am


“No,” he whispers, voice quaking along with the rest of him, his legs folding on their own before he even realized it. “No, this is not… no no no, O-Oh-chan –“

"No, what?" a voice booms from the door and his breath is temporarily robbed off him, staring at the figure standing by the doorway, holding a six-pack Kirin on one hand and balancing takeout boxes on the other. "Hey, aren't you going to help me with these? Jesus, these are heavy, okay? What, are you just going to stand there and stare at me? I'll dump these food here, I swear to god - hmph!" Ohno's words trail, the boxes of take out stumbling out of his grasp when he broke into a run and collides himself against Ohno.

His mouth is on Ohno in an instant, fingers curled round the back of Ohno's neck as he kisses Ohno with all he has.

When he pulls away, his eyes are wet and he is smiling like a lunatic. "Oh-chan, oh my god, I'm not dreaming, am I? You're here, you're really here,"

Ohno smiles and thumbs the sensitive skin beneath his eyes.

"You said to come find you on the day of your birthday, two years to the future, so here I am," Ohno says, "Surprise? I brought beer and food," Ohno pauses and looks down at the boxes of takeout around their feet. "Well, I'm not sure about the food now, though, but -"

He doesn't let Ohno finish because his mouth is there again to steal Ohno's breath and Ohno's words, kissing Ohno and kissing him, kissing him.

"Thank you," he murmurs into Ohno's mouth, voice quivering but he cares too little about that. Ohno is here, that is all that matters. "You're here, that is more than enough, Oh-chan,"

Ohno smiles and reaches up to caress his cheek. "I'm here," he confirms, "Happy birthday, Nino,"

He smiles through his tears and closes his eyes when Ohno leans in and kisses him again.