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nilielhTitle : [Fic] Confessions
Rating : PG
Genre : Angst
Pairing : Ohmiya
Word count : 2,979 words
Summary : It’s heady and intoxicating, and Ohno feels like he could get lost to the sensation of kissing Nino like this, wrapping Nino in his arms as tightly as he could while he nips at Nino’s bottom lip.
Nino rolls his eyes and Ohno makes no effort to call him out on it because he knows.
He knows that when Nino rolls his eyes, it always means two things; 1) is that Nino’s annoyed about something he did (or said, depends on the situation), or 2) is that Nino is already annoyed but is still trying hard not to show it.
Ohno wishes he knows which one is which, because it is during these times that he seldom trusts himself not to get annoyed in return; because an annoyed Nino usually ends up with Nino saying a bunch of mean things to provoke him, and Ohno thinks his current mood isn’t fit for him to be there, enough to swallow Nino’s forthcoming biting quirks.
He sighs, shoving his hands inside his pants’ pockets, leaning back heavily against the wall and stealing a glance over at Nino; Nino looks like he is seconds away from literally combusting and Ohno thinks, here we go.
“That look –“ Nino starts with a growl, the edges of his small mouth curls impatiently at the corners and Ohno blinks slowly, letting the initial prickle of annoyance sizzle warmly across the back of his neck. “you know how much I hate it when you look at me like that,” Nino finishes with a jab of his finger towards Ohno, his anger seeping through each word as he stares into Ohno’s eyes.
Ohno tries to look as passive as he could, a slow smile curving along the corners of his mouth as he watches Nino’s face crumples in clear annoyance, still as adorable as ever and Ohno’s heart flips unceremoniously inside his chest the way it always does when Nino’s so close like this he could almost taste him.
He smiles, slow and easy, and in that instant he knows that Nino knows what he’s thinking, and for once, he wishes he knew how to say the words without stumbling on them before Nino goes and stop him in the middle of talking.
Nino’s brows creases instantly, the tip of his pink tongue grazing his lower lip in that unconscious gesture and Ohno briefly wonders what Nino’s annoyance tastes like if only he could manage to get his lips on it the way he seldom does when he manages to catch Nino off guard.
Ohno makes a sound that is part-resigned, part-amused; shaking his head at the same time Nino crosses the distance between them and collars him matter-of-factly. He feels the shake of Nino’s body against him, the tremble of Nino’s breath when he looks up to stare at Nino’s too-bright eyes.
“Stop,” he mumbles, firm and soft and yearning, and he knows Nino hates him more then, more than he thinks he does before this; he lifts his hand and gently places it over the one that is still curled against his shirt, thumbing at Nino’s knuckles as Nino’s breathing breaks into shuddering little gasps.
It’s times like these when the only thing Ohno wants is to tell Nino how much he means to him, although he knows that it is impossible. Nino’s always been good at reading the air between them, the changes in his eyes that Nino knew well how to interpret, and running off before Ohno even find the brains to say what he’s been meaning to since that night he found Nino curled onto himself and sobbing quietly against the hollow of his own elbow.
“Why’d you do the things you do, when you know how much it confuses the fuck out of me?” Nino hisses, and his voice sounded like it doesn’t belong to him and Ohno suddenly wishes he knew all the answers. Instead, he shakes his head and leans forward, slowly, slowly, taking his time as he waits for Nino to take a step back the way he always does; but Nino manages to surprise him yet again, standing still and looking the least concerned that Ohno is leaning in for a kiss and Ohno’s brain simply melts as he closes his eyes, goes and dives in.
Ohno feels his smile bloom giddily without meaning to when his lips touches Nino’s, and Nino lets his shirt go in favor of wounding his trembling hands around the base of Ohno’s neck. Like this, Ohno could hear all the words Nino isn’t saying, moving his mouth over Nino’s and gasping when Nino tilts his head and opens up, letting Ohno’s tongue in with a wordless sigh.
It always feels good to kiss Nino, Ohno knows this since the first time Nino allows a kiss that overstepped the boundaries of ‘playful’, and marking his territory even though Nino simply regards it as something they could both pretend to forget. There’s this familiarity he only feels when he’s with Nino, his stomach tightens and coils as the tips of Nino’s tongue meets his in the briefest instance.
It’s heady and intoxicating, and Ohno feels like he could get lost to the sensation of kissing Nino like this, wrapping Nino in his arms as tightly as he could while he nips at Nino’s bottom lip.
When he pulls back, Nino’s face is flushed pink and Ohno’s chest tightens at the thought that he’s the reason for it. He grins goofily, and Nino scowls prettily back at him, smacking him lightly across the back of his head.
“Hi,” he says and is rewarded with another light cuff against the side of his head as he in turn places one hand down the small of Nino’s back and the other around the base of Nino’s neck, pulling Nino closer and literally breathing the air that comes out of Nino’s slightly parted mouth. Nino is still pink in the cheeks, but Ohno is at least glad that Nino isn’t moving away, only looking down and avoiding Ohno’s eyes as much as he could. “Kazu?”
“Don’t be a jerk, Satoshi,” Nino mutters through his scowl, feigning innocence as Ohno dances his fingertips along Nino’s spine through the fabric of his shirt. It feels so nice having Nino in his arms like this, like Nino is made only for him as he is for Nino.
He opens his mouth to mutter a comeback, but realizes a second too late that Nino’s not allowing him to, as Nino’s hand is already moving to cover his mouth firmly. “ – no, I don’t want to hear it. I’ll let you play with my emotion for a little while longer, but once we’re out of here, you can forget this ever happened.”
He smiles and makes an effort to open his mouth, enough to lick Nino’s palm until Nino giggles and takes his hand back. It’s so nice to play with Nino when Nino allows him to, but really, not everything about this act is for play, and Ohno’s just so tired playing this game with Nino when the last thing he wanted to do is act like this means nothing, when Nino simply means the world to him.
“Why would I do that when I can hold you like this as if you’re mine?” he asks, leaning in forward to kiss the side of Nino’s neck, and grinning when he feels the tremor run along Nino’s smooth skin where his lips just been to a few seconds ago.
Nino cracks an obviously nervous smile and Ohno feels him shake his head without looking up to see it; this, this isn’t a new thing either, because Nino always tend to treat everything they do together as a joke, and he swears it pisses him as much as pains him knowing that Nino immediately refuses to believe him even before he say anything.
That is why he is mostly afraid of saying things he hardly knows himself because they are the emotions that Nino frequently draws out from him; but those emotions doesn’t faze him as much as they fazes Nino, but he guesses it is because Nino’s too much of a cynic to know just when to appreciate the goodness about those things that makes him truly happy. But he loved Nino through all those ugly faces he’s shown throughout the years, loved him through the good times and even during the bad, loved him even when Nino doesn’t acknowledge the fact that he is worthy to be loved as he is to be cared for.
Ohno knows as much, because there hasn’t been anyone who could make his head spin with too many conflicting emotions the way Nino could when he’s near, when they’re so close that Ohno’s brain couldn’t very well function outside the reality that Nino isn’t his; Nino doesn’t belong to anyone, and Ohno knows it’ll only mean trouble if he brings his intention of owning Nino to light. But it never stops him from wanting Nino, of wanting to give Nino everything Nino wished to have if he could.
He knows exactly how Nino’s touches affect him, how his insides turns into useless puddle of mess whenever Nino leans in for a kiss, whether it be for play or not, how every brush of Nino’s lips against his are like balls of fire igniting him from deep within, while he staggers quite literally on his feet for wanting Nino so badly..
There are lots of things he had wanted to say, so many unspoken promises he remembered uttering between those quiet times he held Nino close, wishing he could tell Nino just how much Nino’s presence has been enough to light up even the darkest corner of Ohno’s life.
Because Nino doesn’t believe that he’s worth the love he’s freely given, and Ohno wishes he could show Nino how much he’s willing to try, enough for Nino to believe him.
Ohno loves Nino, and for now, Ohno hopes it’s enough.
He kisses Nino’s cheek soundly and Nino huffs, annoyed. “Only, I am not.” Nino answers, his voice is clear and high-pitched and so, so Nino. Ohno wants to kiss him till he stops talking, and then kiss him again until his lips are bruised enough to make him want to stay.
“Just say the word,” he mumbles with a smile and pausing to brush Nino’s arms affectionately. “ – and I might. I don’t mind – making you mine, that is,”
Nino visibly stiffens and he knows he’s stepping forward into the forbidden line, but he’s too far gone to even think of going back. He wants this, more than anything he thought he’d ever wanted, and more than anything he wish he could ever want since the day Nino looked into his eyes and smiled; Nino owned him since then, and he’s never glad to be so in love with Nino than he is right now.
“You don’t love me,” Nino says, low and gravely, and Ohno wonders how utterly stupid Nino is sometimes; he scowls right back but his expression immediately softens when thinks he detects something in Nino’s voice that he’s sure isn’t there before. “So I don’t think that’s –“
“I don’t know who gave you the idea,” he mutters, pouting. “It’s not like I’ve not been showing you what I truly feel for you whenever you’re kind enough to let me,”
Nino moves to pull back, gaping as he stares at him wide-eyed. “You don’t – y-you c-cant…” he says, and the last words sounded more of a question rather than mere statement. Ohno smiles and takes Nino’s face in between his hands before letting one of his hand drop to grab Nino’s own, placing it over his chest where his heart throbs furiously against their joined hands.
Nino’s breath catches in his throat, gaping as Ohno beams back at him.
“How’d you know that? It isn’t your heart, it’s mine; it will love who it wants to love and it is not your place to say that it doesn’t love you just because you think it can’t. That’s rude, you know?”
Nino gasps, then laughs, raw and husky and hopeful, and Ohno sees something in Nino’s eyes that really isn’t there the last time he looked up to stare; god, doesn’t Nino realize that he’s the reason Ohno is glad that he’s alive, that Nino’s the reason for his smile every morning when he wakes up?
He chuckles and blinks as he folds his palm against one of Nino’s heated cheeks, wanting to draw out every possible emotion out of Nino, if only to make sure they are both heading into the right direction. This time, Ohno quietly promises himself, he’s not going to let Nino go without clearing everything up in between them.
“You never said anything,” Nino whispers, his eyelashes fluttering beautifully and Ohno stops wondering how Nino manages to look so innocent even when he’s saying the stupidest things, ever.
“You didn’t give me the chance,” Ohno retorts with a smile, and Nino frowns, confused.
“What the hell do you mean by that?”
Ohno knows he’s grinning mischievously, but he feels elated when he sees Nino bites down on his lips and looking like he’s obviously trying to keep himself from grinning right back.
“Just that,” he starts, reaching up to stroke Nino’s cheek with his free hand and leaning in to kiss Nino’s lips tenderly; he doesn’t know where he’s going with this, but he knows deep down that he wouldn’t be able to get a chance like this if he isn’t going to grab this rare opportunity now. “I mean it just like that – that I love you and I wish we could stop circling around each other and admit that we’re crazy about one another, -- like, really crazy, stupidly in love with each other…” he states, grinning, and feeling like he’s floating on air when he sees the corners of Nino’s mouth twitches in apparent amusement.
“Is it because I let you kiss me when no one’s around to witness it?” Nino asks, hesitant and scared, and Ohno just wants to keep showing him how much he loves him if it means ending all of Nino’s uncertainty and fears.
He grins and takes one of Nino’s hand, lifting it to drop tiny, loving kisses to each of Nino’s knuckles; Nino blushes and looks away, nibbling his lower lip in a way so sexy that makes Ohno think of pushing Nino against the wall he’s currently leaning at and maybe, just maybe –
“Part of it is because you let me kiss you when no one’s around,” he says, laughing good-naturedly when Nino narrows his eyes and smacks him lightly on the chest.
“Satoshi – stop playing around,” Nino warns, but his voice sounded so different this time, like he’s patiently waiting for Ohno to say what he’s been too afraid to say himself.
“Never,” Ohno muses, kissing Nino’s temple twice before giving in to the need of tasting Nino’s fears underneath his tongue; Nino is as pliant as he remembers him to be, arching to each and every stroke of Ohno’s fingers against the small of his back as Nino moans softly through Ohno’s mouth.
They’re both breathing raggedly when they part, and Ohno’s finger moves on their own to cup Nino’s jaw tenderly.
Nino meets his eyes shyly, and smiles in that way that makes Ohno’s knees wobble like jelly. “A-Are you sure?” Nino asks, still a little bit hesitant and Ohno couldn’t really blame him; Nino’s going to need a lot of persuading for him to be able to believe that someone actually loved him despite of everything.
Ohno chuckles, content and happy that Nino still isn’t running away, that Nino looks like he wants to try and believe Ohno’s words. “If you let me – yes,” Ohno’s reply is as simple as him realizing that his world revolves around Nino and Nino alone.
“W-What if –“
He catches Nino’s next words with his lips, shifting them around until Nino is the one backed against the wall, trapping each side of Nino’s head by placing both hands kissing Nino hard till Nino ended up panting deliciously through his mouth.
He pulls away, but still as close as he could manage, basking on the feeling of finally being allowed to love Nino freely; Nino sighs, finally submitting himself to the fact that Ohno’s not letting him get away for once, as Nino buries his nose against Ohno’s neck.
“I’ll take it as it comes, but for now, just say you are willing to try and we’ll start from there,” he says, finishing it with another bone-melting kiss as Nino folds himself obediently inside Ohno’s arms.
“Okay,” Nino says, looking just the slightest bit embarrassed and Ohno suddenly feels so lucky to be alive.
“Don’t run away,” he murmurs his request against Nino’s cheek, nosing at Nino’s smooth skin as he cradle the younger man closer, and closer still; his chest feels light and heavy at the same time, but he knows that everything’s going change from here on. Nino’s answering nod against his chest cemented his doubt, and everything around them seemed to sparkle the next time he opens his eyes.
“I w-won’t,”
Nino tucks himself securely around his hold and Ohno feels content, complete, having Nino here.
“Tell me,”
Nino raises his face, tilts his head to the side as a stubborn smirk blooms at the corners of his mouth; Ohno knows a challenge when he sees one, lifting his hand up and pressing his finger against the edges of Nino’s lips.
Nino smiles mischievously as he presses himself flush against Ohno’s body.
“Make me.”
Ohno nods and pulls Nino tight as he presses their foreheads together.
“Ready?”
Nino rolls his eyes, but this time, Ohno knows it isn’t because of the usual; Nino is happy, and Ohno intends to keep him that way even if it means he has to work hard for it.
He loves Nino and he knows it’ll be worth it.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
(no subject)
Date: 2012-09-13 06:43 pm (UTC)fufufu...~ ^^
thank you for sharing...~
(no subject)
Date: 2012-09-13 07:03 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2012-09-13 06:46 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2012-09-13 07:04 pm (UTC)Thanks for reading BB~
(no subject)
Date: 2012-09-13 07:16 pm (UTC)Such a breathtaking moment!
My heart was aching until Nino finally decide to succumb...
Beautiful!
Thanks for the Ohmiya happiness!
(no subject)
Date: 2012-09-13 07:23 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2012-09-13 07:25 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2012-09-13 07:31 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2012-09-13 07:58 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2012-09-13 08:07 pm (UTC)Thank you!
And from Ohno's POW <3 <3 <3 Sometimes your fic are like that, a lot of thoughts, and a little bit of "action", but sooooo deep.. :)
And yes, as someone said, Nino is such a girl here.
But I have a soft spot for insecure-Nino, so it's ok.. <3
Thank you!
(no subject)
Date: 2012-09-14 02:09 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2012-09-15 11:34 pm (UTC)utter perfection c:
(no subject)
Date: 2012-09-24 06:23 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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