nilielh | One step forward, two steps back

Title : One step forward, two steps back
Pairing : Ohno/Nino
Rating : PG
Genre : Drama. Light angst. Romance
Disclaimer : fiction desu
Summary : Somehow, he gets it; Nino's reaction to things that involve feelings (and stuff he normally doesn't discuss openly) is to not talk about it, if he could.

They're quiet when they exit the studio, when they walk the hall and into their shared greenroom; he supposed he should have seen it coming, but expecting it is obviously different from actually facing it, especially when he's unsure whether he should apologize or just let things take care of themselves the way he supposed they would in the end.

Somehow, he gets it; Nino's reaction to things that involve feelings (and stuff he normally doesn't discuss openly) is to not talk about it, if he could. Mostly how he deals with stuff himself, really, though he's certain that's not exactly healthy. They've known each other for years, and they've been friends for far longer, so he's kind of used to the way Nino deals with stuff like this to be offended by Nino's blatant display of nonchalance, but he guesses he deserves the treatment anyway.

He sighs and follows Nino to the door, watches Nino’s slouched back as he walks the rest of the way inside, leaving him to deal with the door as he carefully slides out of his suit jacket before hanging it onto the back of a nearby chair. Ohno copies the action and does the same to his own stylist-issued jacket, sighing under his breath and wondering whether asking Nino out to dinner is the right thing to do if only to dispel the awkward air between them, until he hears Nino’s voice calling out to him and effectively breaking through his inner musings.

“Huh?” he mumbles, feeling rather stupid as he chances a glance at Nino and finds Nino staring. “What?”

The corner of Nino’s mouth twitches unhappily, and he has this look on his face that says he’s not even the least bit amused at Ohno’s antics.

To be honest, Ohno can totally relate. He’s not entirely happy about the whole thing either, but it’s a done thing and obviously, there’s absolutely nothing he could do to change it now.

“Sorry, were you saying something? I’m sorry I wasn’t –“

“Paying attention, yeah, I can see that,” Nino cuts in, without heat, but the statement makes Ohno blush in combined surprise and embarrassment just the same. “That’s hardly surprising, I must say. Since you only pay attention to stuff that interests you.” Nino says, his words undoubtedly marred with meaning that makes Ohno’s heart hurt.

“You make it sound like it’s a bad thing,” he says, vaguely wondering where this conversation is heading. “When you should know there are only a few things I consider important, and thus worthy enough of my interest.” He says.

Nino’s lip lilts imperceptibly. Almost. “Yeah. Fishing. Art. Remote controlled cars,” Nino enumerates, folding his arms over his chest and leaning back against the makeup table. It’s a completely defensive gesture, one that breaks Ohno’s heart a little knowing what the action means.

It’s like Nino is trying to protect himself from being deliberately hurt, because Ohno does so without thinking.

He’s an absolute idiot, really.

“Arashi,” he adds, watching Nino carefully as he walks the short distance between them.

He breathes through his nose, stops when he’s close enough to Nino that he could see the outline of Nino’s mouth from the short distance. “You.”

Nino huffs. “Joke time, Leader?” Nino says. “Come on, drop the bullshit. There are no cameras around anymore.”

“You don’t believe me,” is what he says, and it’s more of a statement than a question, feeling that uncomfortable knot settling itself in his stomach.

“Well, can you blame me? You have this stupid habit of making stuff up on national tv, and frankly, they’re not even funny.”

“Fine,” he counters, without breaking their gazes. “Doesn’t mean they’re not true, though.”

“What the hell does that even mean?”

He shrugs. “That I meant what I said,” he mutters, eyeing Nino’s face carefully. “I – Well, you stopped leaning into me. Stopped touching me. It makes me lonely, realizing that you did. You didn’t have to, though. I mean -”

Nino huffs out an un-amused laughter. “Seriously? If it bothered you that much, why didn’t you say something sooner? Why wait five years to bring it up?”

He scrunches his nose and gives Nino a look. “I always forget about it when we’re together. We’re so busy these days, you realize. Also, I can’t seem to get the timing right.”

“For what?”

He shrugs. “For so many things,” he says, and there’s that familiar lump in his throat when their gazes catch. Twenty years down the road and that look on Nino’s eyes remains the same, and Ohno wonders why he never bothered asking what it means. But maybe because he knows – he’s always known, really – and he’s just afraid to admit it out loud himself.

“You’re not making any sense, I swear –“

He steps closer and stops if only so he could put his fingers on Nino’s jaw. Nino opens his mouth to talk but shuts it off again immediately, and Ohno finds a smile for him despite the way this closeness is wreaking havoc to his senses, to his thinly-veiled control as he stands there thumbing Nino’s cheek.

“I know, but it’s been so long and you’ve been patient enough for far longer. Bear with me until - until the end of next year, and I promise I won’t make you wait a day more. Please, Nino.”

“What –“

He doesn’t say anymore, and he doesn’t allow Nino to voice out his confusion either. He just pulls him in, presses a quick, chaste kiss to the corner of Nino’s lips before hugging him tight, his hand firmly around the back of Nino’s neck to keep him in place.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

From:

daisukidesu3.livejournal.com

Ahhhhhh!!!! Sneaky Ohno hinting at things. That confusing bastard. Not sure why Nino even puts up with him.

(It’s love, of course, we all know that. But still...)

You know you can’t just leave it here, so I’ll be looking forward to the continuation. (Sending a coffee your way to ensure it does ☕️)

😘💙💛