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nilielhTitle : [Fic] I Have Kept You In My Heart (Part 2)
Pairing : Ohno/Jun, Sho/Nino, Ohno/Nino, Eventual Jun/?
Rating : R
Summary : Before Jun, there was only Nino. The man Ohno loved with everything he had, loved with such ferocity that any other emotion would pale in comparison. He was Ohno's everything, the love of his life, the person Ohno dreamed of sharing his whole life with someday. Until Nino's untimely death, six years ago.
Disclaimer : fiction, yo!
Warning : Angst in large doses. Memory loss. Minor character death. One-sided love.
Sho came back from the nurse’s station where he’d called Ninomiya’s mother to find Ninomiya already propped up on his bed, wearing a frown that would have sent most of the faint-hearted nurses running. Nurse Kiritani, however, did not. Instead, she stood by Ninomiya’s bedside, talking in hushed tones, and obviously trying her very best to calm Ninomiya down, by the looks of it.
Sho stepped inside and nodded his head at her in thanks.
“Ninomiya-san, how are you feeling?” he inquired after Ninomiya when he was close enough to do so. He reached over and waited until Ninomiya had voluntarily offered his hand for Sho to take, Sho’s fingers automatically curling around Ninomiya’s wrist to check on his pulse.
Ninomiya’s skin was warm to the touch, and it once again reminded Sho that this was the same person he had patiently cared for for the past six years, alive and hopefully healthy. This close, Sho was treated with the lovely sight of his caramel-colored eyes, bright and alive and staring expectantly back at Sho.
It unnerved Sho quite literally, stunned by the man’s arresting beauty upclose.
“Does it hurt anywhere?” he asked as he dropped Ninomiya’s hand, already missing it’s warmth where he placed it carefully on the bed.
Ninomiya shook his head. “No.”
Sho took that in stride and looked Ninomiya over. He did look fine, though, they couldn’t be certain until he had Ninomiya’s test results in hand. He needed to schedule those, too, in the morning.
“How about your head? Do you feel dizzy or anything?”
“I feel fine.”
Sho nodded, pressing his lips together. He knew enough to be worried, but saying so in front of a miraculously-recovered patient, who had been declared un-treatable, seemed highly inadequate, so Sho bit his tongue instead.
“But my legs feel weird and I have this nagging feeling that I haven’t been in contact with a toothbrush for so long.” Ninomiya said in a completely straight face, making Sho gape at him for a moment before he himself broke into a helpless grin.
“Ah, I totally understand. Shall we help you to the bathroom, then?”
Ninomiya smiled, and Sho was certain there was a reason why he’d never gave this patient up, no matter what those other doctors told him. That smile and the light in Ninomiya’s eyes despite the lingering confusion he was battling from within, just about did it for Sho.
“Please,” Ninomiya whispered just as Sho offered his hand to help Ninomiya off the bed. “I honestly think something crawled in my mouth and died in there. It feels disgusting, to be honest.”
Sho laughed, feeling something inside him physically break when Ninomiya did the same.
“Woah!” Ninomiya exclaimed when his feet touched the floor and his legs immediately gave up on him. Sho was thankful that he was close enough to catch Ninomiya’s fall, Nurse Kiritani quite literally levitating towards them to help. He had his arms branded around Ninomiya’s waist to steady him, his heart breaking at the words escaping Ninomiya’s lips the second after, his voice shaking just like the rest of him.
“Sensei, what the hell is wrong with me?”
++
He’d expected this. He honestly did. But that didn’t mean dealing with it would be easy.
He heaved a sigh and wished he didn’t seem as helpless as he felt, as he reached over and patted Ninomiya’s hand. It was a silly excuse to touch, to offer comfort he knew the other man needed, something he didn’t need to do but did so anyway.
“You’re saying I had an accident,” Ninomiya said, though his eyes seemed not to recall anything with regards to what Sho was saying.
Sho nodded but offered nothing more. He knew better than to disclose information to a patient who obviously couldn’t remember anything, and he wasn’t about to start now.
Even though Ninomiya obviously wanted him to.
“But I - I don’t remember any of it.” Ninomiya added, his mouth lined with confusion. Sho took Ninomiya’s hands in his and squeezed.
“It will come, Ninomiya-san,” he said, silently hoping it would happen. He didn’t want to admit it but he hated seeing this look on Ninomiya’s face, his confusion wearing him down, knowing that there were things even a doctor like him couldn’t do. “Just be patient, okay?”
“But how long do I have to wait?” Ninomiya countered, and Sho expected this reaction, too. “A day? A week? A month? A year? Ten years? Tell me, Sensei, what if I ended up not remembering it, do you think I -”
“Then it’s probably for the best, Ninomiya-san,” Sho said, cutting Ninomiya off. “I have no way of knowing when you’ll get your memories back, or if you’ll ever get them, but if you ask me, I’ll say that that’s the least of my concerns right now.” he said. Ninomiya frowned at him and Sho paused to breathe air back into his lungs, and stared straight into Ninomiya’s eyes.
“You’re alive, and honestly, right now, that is more than enough for me and for your family.”
++
The trip to the hospital was a bleary affair, and Aiba honestly couldn't remember most of it. His memories of the events that followed were distorted, almost indistinguishable through the fuzz clouding his senses.
Still, he’d had to rely on them to make it through, especially after the initial shock of finding himself being pushed out of the cab, the second it skidded into a stop in front of the hospital entrance, his hand clutching Nino's mother's hand tugging roughly against his own.
From then on, it was even blurrier. Aiba didn't even know how they ended up riding the elevator to the fifth floor when they were merely lounging in front of the nurse's station minutes before, until they were already there.
Apparently, Aiba's body was moving on autopilot, with Nino's mother's hand guiding him exactly where he needed to go.
He heard the sound of a door closing, and then the feel of her hand tugging his. Everything felt weird, and Aiba honestly couldn't pinpoint when things became even weirder. He felt strangely detached from his own body, like he was watching stuff from someone else's eyes as he found himself moving on autopilot again.
A man in white met them at the front of a closed door, and Aiba watched him take one of Nino's mother's hand into his that wasn't clutching Aiba's own.
"S-Sensei, what happened? Is he - I-Is he okay? D-Did he t-talk?" she asked when the doctor greeted them with a slight bow of his head, his hands still clutching one of hers.
"I was doing my daily rounds, checking up on his vitals when he opened his eyes. Kiritani-san was with me when he did, Kazuko-san." the doctor said and paused, shaking his head like he himself couldn't believe what he was saying.
"And, did he say anything? Asked anything?"
"Yes," the doctor nodded. "Just normal stuff, like, why he’s here and how long he’s been out of it. It seems like he can't remember anything prior to the accident, and even the accident itself, but I’m certain that is just to be expected." the doctor added.
“M-Memory loss?” she breathed, voice quivering. Aiba squeezed her hand, offering comfort, despite his lingering confusion.
"We still don't know the extent of it, but I'm guessing he’s missing a few years, give and take four to five before the day of the accident. But we still can’t say for certain." the doctor said, with which Nino's mother simply answered with a nod of her head.
"B-But he's - he's okay...right?"
The doctor nodded. "As far as I can tell, yes. But we still need to perform some more tests to determine if the memory loss is the only thing we should be concerned about."
"Please do what's necessary, Sensei." she said, her voice low and pleading.
"Of course, Kazuko-san, you don’t even need to ask me that." The doctor said, then glanced to where Aiba stood next to the woman he was talking to. "Hmm, sorry for asking but, I didn't know he has a brother?"
She glanced at Aiba and smiled softly his way. "He doesn't. Aiba-kun is his best friend." she said, simply, to which the doctor nodded his head in apprehension. The exchange didn't help with Aiba's growing confusion, not even for one bit.
"Can we see him now?" she asked, her fingers tightening around Aiba's own.
"Of course," the doctor answered, leading them towards the door. He knocked a few times and murmured something that sounded like 'pardon the intrusion' before he opened the door.
"Ninomiya-san, you have visitors," the doctor announced, and Aiba found himself looking straight into a familiar pair of liquid brown eyes, and an equally familiar smirk that just about robbed the breath straight from his lungs.
It was difficult to look away and Aiba found himself rooted on the spot he was standing on, blinking rapidly and waiting for the image of his best friend, alive and smiling, to disappear.
It didn’t.
"Oh, hi Mom! I didn't know Idiot-chan would be coming with you," greeted the man sitting on the bed, who sounded exactly like Nino. Aiba felt something in his brain clicked, connecting the conversation he heard earlier to the person grinning expectantly at them from the bed.
"N-Nino?"
The person on the bed that looked exactly his best friend rolled his eyes in that painfully familiar way and grinned.
"The one and only," he said, before quickly adding, "and will you please quit looking at me like I just came back from the dead? It's seriously creeping me out."
Aiba didn't - he couldn't - he was breaking down exactly the same time Nino's mother did, and together, they bolted towards the bed where Nino was, almost toppling Nino over in their haste to tug Nino into their arms.
++
“How are you feeling?” Aiba asked, his forehead creased with worry as he squeezed Nino’s hand lightly.
“That’s the fifth time you asked me that, if you haven’t noticed,” Nino retorted, slapping his hand away. Aiba ignored him and went back to cradle Nino’s hand in his, while Nino’s mother went outside to talk to the Nino’s doctor.
“Just answer the question, Nino.”
Nino rolled his eyes but did so, anyway. “I’m fine, okay? Happy now?”
Aiba wanted to tell him he was more than happy, more than glad to find Nino alive and well, but couldn’t find the exact words to say it. There were things in his head that were making it specifically difficult to be properly grateful, but Aiba knew it wasn’t the time, nor the place to think about them.
Especially since he still had no idea how this happened, how Nino ended up alive when they’ve just been mourning the pain of losing him, six years after his supposed death.
Or so they thought.
“I’m just worried,” he said, biting back the urge to cry once more. He’d already been chastised enough for crying, but Aiba knew it was inevitable, anyway. His tears come out no matter what he was feeling. And he was currently overwhelmed with emotion he couldn’t contain, so Nino would have to deal with it all, as payback for all the tears Aiba had willingly and unwillingly shed for Nino himself during the past six years thinking he was dead.
“Stop worrying, it’ll give you premature wrinkles,” Nino told him, jabbing a finger to Aiba’s forehead. “Which you already have, how odd.” Nino mused, leaning over for a closer look. Aiba blinked, stilled under Nino’s careful observation.
“Hey, have you been coloring your hair?” Nino asked, suddenly, fingering the strands of stubborn hair falling over Aiba’s eyes. “And I swear you had a different haircut the last time we saw each other, like, a week ago, right? And it’s this long now? How the hell did that happen?”
Aiba felt a tremor coming. It was obvious that the no one had yet to tell Nino what had happened to him, or how long he’d been in a coma. Aiba was certain he didn’t want it to be him.
“Umm, yeah? It’s a new trend, silly.”
“But I swear you had an almost military cut that time so how come -”
“Hair extensions! You haven’t heard of that, Nino-chan? Oh my god, seriously?” he countered, shoving his shaking fingers through his hair.
Nino gave him the stinky eye and pouted, crossing his arms tightly over his chest.
“I’m not blind, Aiba-chan,” Nino muttered, and Aiba was certain his heart was going mile a minute as sweat started gathering on his temple. “I know something is wrong, but the doctor wouldn’t tell me, and you’re obviously doing the same.” Nino said.
“I don’t really -”
“That accident, when did it happen? And why I couldn’t remember any of it? Is this scar in my forehead has something to do with it? Tell me or I swear I’ll choke it out of you.”
“Nino-chan, I -”
“Ninomiya-san, it’s time to take your medicine,” Nurse Kiritani announced from the doorway, and Aiba found himself gasping in relief as he shuffled out of her way.
Nino said nothing but the way he had locked gazes with Aiba told him this wasn’t going to end here.
It was high time he talked to Nino’s mother, then.
++
"I - I still don't understand how this is possible," Aiba whispered, watching his best friend sleeping on the bed, his hand clutching Nino’s wrist lightly as if he couldn’t bear to let him go even when he was certain Nino wasn’t going anywhere.
"I mean, we buried him." he hissed, low and gravely. “At least I thought we did.”
Aiba blinked, flooded with the memories of that painful day as if only happened yesterday. He didn’t even get to see Nino, because no one was allowed to anymore, after Nino was brought back home from the hospital morgue.
Aiba himself couldn’t believe it - he talked to Nino two days before the accident happened, after all, and finding out that he was going back home to his best friend’s funeral, of all things, obviously didn’t help.
“W-We did, right?” he murmured, eyes wide.
Of course, how could he be certain when Nino’s casket was kept closed all throughout the wake? Somehow, he vaguely remembered someone saying about Nino’s face being too bruised and swollen to be viewed that his family opted not to open the casket, and Aiba feeling all too overwhelmed with misery to even question it.
Nino's mother shifted from where she was sitting on the chair on Nino's left bedside, fingers stroking Nino's hair. After being awake only for an hour, Nino seemed to tire easily. The fact was enough for Nino's mother to worry immediately but the doctor - Sakurai-san - told them that it was just normal.
Nino was still recovering, he said, and sleeping was one of our body’s natural way of healing itself. Aiba was certain Kazuko-san wasn’t all that convinced, seeing that the older woman had stubbornly refused to leave Nino’s side until she was sure her son would wake up the second time around.
“No,” she said, her voice sounded emotionless.“We buried an empty casket.” was her simple reply, as if that would somehow answer everything.
Aiba honestly wondered how to tell her it was actually the opposite.
“Kaa-chan, you do realize -”
“I know, but it was the only thing I could think of then, Ma-kun,” she said, quickly cutting him off. “The doctors told me he wasn’t going to make it, anyway. So, I thought, why prolong the agony if I could spare you all the pain that I’d still have to suffer until the time he draws his last breath? It was going to happen anyway. Sure, his heart was still beating then, but the doctors were certain it would only be a matter of time till it stops, permanently.”
Aiba blinked, fingers tightening around Nino’s wrist. “But it didn’t.”
She shook her head but her gaze was on her son’s peacefully sleeping face on the bed.
“No, it didn’t,” she said. “He was so brave, fighting for his life even though everyone at the hospital thought I was foolish for doing the same. They kept telling me that even if he regains consciousness, he’ll only end up like a human vegetable - and that honestly was one of the reasons why I kept his condition a secret.” she paused her, wiping the tears that fell on her cheeks.
“I’d never want anyone to look at him like they’re sorry he’s alive, that he’d better off dead than to live miserably like the doctors predicted. As his mother, I couldn’t allow that, I just couldn’t. That’s why I did it.” she said, voice trembling.
“But Oh-chan wouldn’t have left Chiba if he knew Nino was alive,” he said, heart breaking. “He probably would have stayed by Nino’s side, and wouldn’t have found someone else to -”
“Maybe,” she cut him off again, her voice surprisingly clear. “But I’m certain that Kazu would have done the same if the decision was up to him. He wouldn’t want to keep Satoshi-kun waiting, knowing that the possibility of him recovering is close to nothing. Kazu wouldn’t ever want to tie Satoshi-kun to a promise he couldn’t keep himself, and it would be unfair to expect the same from Satoshi-kun.”
Aiba didn’t dare say anything in return, knowing that anything he might come up with then would mean nothing. There was no sense blaming her for her decisions, no matter how it could have changed the lives of all involved.
He simply ducked his head and nuzzled his best friend’s arm, closing his eyes and listening to each and every breath Nino took in his sleep, and feeling entirely grateful for hearing it.
That would be enough, for now.
Pairing : Ohno/Jun, Sho/Nino, Ohno/Nino, Eventual Jun/?
Rating : R
Summary : Before Jun, there was only Nino. The man Ohno loved with everything he had, loved with such ferocity that any other emotion would pale in comparison. He was Ohno's everything, the love of his life, the person Ohno dreamed of sharing his whole life with someday. Until Nino's untimely death, six years ago.
Disclaimer : fiction, yo!
Warning : Angst in large doses. Memory loss. Minor character death. One-sided love.
Sho came back from the nurse’s station where he’d called Ninomiya’s mother to find Ninomiya already propped up on his bed, wearing a frown that would have sent most of the faint-hearted nurses running. Nurse Kiritani, however, did not. Instead, she stood by Ninomiya’s bedside, talking in hushed tones, and obviously trying her very best to calm Ninomiya down, by the looks of it.
Sho stepped inside and nodded his head at her in thanks.
“Ninomiya-san, how are you feeling?” he inquired after Ninomiya when he was close enough to do so. He reached over and waited until Ninomiya had voluntarily offered his hand for Sho to take, Sho’s fingers automatically curling around Ninomiya’s wrist to check on his pulse.
Ninomiya’s skin was warm to the touch, and it once again reminded Sho that this was the same person he had patiently cared for for the past six years, alive and hopefully healthy. This close, Sho was treated with the lovely sight of his caramel-colored eyes, bright and alive and staring expectantly back at Sho.
It unnerved Sho quite literally, stunned by the man’s arresting beauty upclose.
“Does it hurt anywhere?” he asked as he dropped Ninomiya’s hand, already missing it’s warmth where he placed it carefully on the bed.
Ninomiya shook his head. “No.”
Sho took that in stride and looked Ninomiya over. He did look fine, though, they couldn’t be certain until he had Ninomiya’s test results in hand. He needed to schedule those, too, in the morning.
“How about your head? Do you feel dizzy or anything?”
“I feel fine.”
Sho nodded, pressing his lips together. He knew enough to be worried, but saying so in front of a miraculously-recovered patient, who had been declared un-treatable, seemed highly inadequate, so Sho bit his tongue instead.
“But my legs feel weird and I have this nagging feeling that I haven’t been in contact with a toothbrush for so long.” Ninomiya said in a completely straight face, making Sho gape at him for a moment before he himself broke into a helpless grin.
“Ah, I totally understand. Shall we help you to the bathroom, then?”
Ninomiya smiled, and Sho was certain there was a reason why he’d never gave this patient up, no matter what those other doctors told him. That smile and the light in Ninomiya’s eyes despite the lingering confusion he was battling from within, just about did it for Sho.
“Please,” Ninomiya whispered just as Sho offered his hand to help Ninomiya off the bed. “I honestly think something crawled in my mouth and died in there. It feels disgusting, to be honest.”
Sho laughed, feeling something inside him physically break when Ninomiya did the same.
“Woah!” Ninomiya exclaimed when his feet touched the floor and his legs immediately gave up on him. Sho was thankful that he was close enough to catch Ninomiya’s fall, Nurse Kiritani quite literally levitating towards them to help. He had his arms branded around Ninomiya’s waist to steady him, his heart breaking at the words escaping Ninomiya’s lips the second after, his voice shaking just like the rest of him.
“Sensei, what the hell is wrong with me?”
++
He’d expected this. He honestly did. But that didn’t mean dealing with it would be easy.
He heaved a sigh and wished he didn’t seem as helpless as he felt, as he reached over and patted Ninomiya’s hand. It was a silly excuse to touch, to offer comfort he knew the other man needed, something he didn’t need to do but did so anyway.
“You’re saying I had an accident,” Ninomiya said, though his eyes seemed not to recall anything with regards to what Sho was saying.
Sho nodded but offered nothing more. He knew better than to disclose information to a patient who obviously couldn’t remember anything, and he wasn’t about to start now.
Even though Ninomiya obviously wanted him to.
“But I - I don’t remember any of it.” Ninomiya added, his mouth lined with confusion. Sho took Ninomiya’s hands in his and squeezed.
“It will come, Ninomiya-san,” he said, silently hoping it would happen. He didn’t want to admit it but he hated seeing this look on Ninomiya’s face, his confusion wearing him down, knowing that there were things even a doctor like him couldn’t do. “Just be patient, okay?”
“But how long do I have to wait?” Ninomiya countered, and Sho expected this reaction, too. “A day? A week? A month? A year? Ten years? Tell me, Sensei, what if I ended up not remembering it, do you think I -”
“Then it’s probably for the best, Ninomiya-san,” Sho said, cutting Ninomiya off. “I have no way of knowing when you’ll get your memories back, or if you’ll ever get them, but if you ask me, I’ll say that that’s the least of my concerns right now.” he said. Ninomiya frowned at him and Sho paused to breathe air back into his lungs, and stared straight into Ninomiya’s eyes.
“You’re alive, and honestly, right now, that is more than enough for me and for your family.”
++
The trip to the hospital was a bleary affair, and Aiba honestly couldn't remember most of it. His memories of the events that followed were distorted, almost indistinguishable through the fuzz clouding his senses.
Still, he’d had to rely on them to make it through, especially after the initial shock of finding himself being pushed out of the cab, the second it skidded into a stop in front of the hospital entrance, his hand clutching Nino's mother's hand tugging roughly against his own.
From then on, it was even blurrier. Aiba didn't even know how they ended up riding the elevator to the fifth floor when they were merely lounging in front of the nurse's station minutes before, until they were already there.
Apparently, Aiba's body was moving on autopilot, with Nino's mother's hand guiding him exactly where he needed to go.
He heard the sound of a door closing, and then the feel of her hand tugging his. Everything felt weird, and Aiba honestly couldn't pinpoint when things became even weirder. He felt strangely detached from his own body, like he was watching stuff from someone else's eyes as he found himself moving on autopilot again.
A man in white met them at the front of a closed door, and Aiba watched him take one of Nino's mother's hand into his that wasn't clutching Aiba's own.
"S-Sensei, what happened? Is he - I-Is he okay? D-Did he t-talk?" she asked when the doctor greeted them with a slight bow of his head, his hands still clutching one of hers.
"I was doing my daily rounds, checking up on his vitals when he opened his eyes. Kiritani-san was with me when he did, Kazuko-san." the doctor said and paused, shaking his head like he himself couldn't believe what he was saying.
"And, did he say anything? Asked anything?"
"Yes," the doctor nodded. "Just normal stuff, like, why he’s here and how long he’s been out of it. It seems like he can't remember anything prior to the accident, and even the accident itself, but I’m certain that is just to be expected." the doctor added.
“M-Memory loss?” she breathed, voice quivering. Aiba squeezed her hand, offering comfort, despite his lingering confusion.
"We still don't know the extent of it, but I'm guessing he’s missing a few years, give and take four to five before the day of the accident. But we still can’t say for certain." the doctor said, with which Nino's mother simply answered with a nod of her head.
"B-But he's - he's okay...right?"
The doctor nodded. "As far as I can tell, yes. But we still need to perform some more tests to determine if the memory loss is the only thing we should be concerned about."
"Please do what's necessary, Sensei." she said, her voice low and pleading.
"Of course, Kazuko-san, you don’t even need to ask me that." The doctor said, then glanced to where Aiba stood next to the woman he was talking to. "Hmm, sorry for asking but, I didn't know he has a brother?"
She glanced at Aiba and smiled softly his way. "He doesn't. Aiba-kun is his best friend." she said, simply, to which the doctor nodded his head in apprehension. The exchange didn't help with Aiba's growing confusion, not even for one bit.
"Can we see him now?" she asked, her fingers tightening around Aiba's own.
"Of course," the doctor answered, leading them towards the door. He knocked a few times and murmured something that sounded like 'pardon the intrusion' before he opened the door.
"Ninomiya-san, you have visitors," the doctor announced, and Aiba found himself looking straight into a familiar pair of liquid brown eyes, and an equally familiar smirk that just about robbed the breath straight from his lungs.
It was difficult to look away and Aiba found himself rooted on the spot he was standing on, blinking rapidly and waiting for the image of his best friend, alive and smiling, to disappear.
It didn’t.
"Oh, hi Mom! I didn't know Idiot-chan would be coming with you," greeted the man sitting on the bed, who sounded exactly like Nino. Aiba felt something in his brain clicked, connecting the conversation he heard earlier to the person grinning expectantly at them from the bed.
"N-Nino?"
The person on the bed that looked exactly his best friend rolled his eyes in that painfully familiar way and grinned.
"The one and only," he said, before quickly adding, "and will you please quit looking at me like I just came back from the dead? It's seriously creeping me out."
Aiba didn't - he couldn't - he was breaking down exactly the same time Nino's mother did, and together, they bolted towards the bed where Nino was, almost toppling Nino over in their haste to tug Nino into their arms.
++
“How are you feeling?” Aiba asked, his forehead creased with worry as he squeezed Nino’s hand lightly.
“That’s the fifth time you asked me that, if you haven’t noticed,” Nino retorted, slapping his hand away. Aiba ignored him and went back to cradle Nino’s hand in his, while Nino’s mother went outside to talk to the Nino’s doctor.
“Just answer the question, Nino.”
Nino rolled his eyes but did so, anyway. “I’m fine, okay? Happy now?”
Aiba wanted to tell him he was more than happy, more than glad to find Nino alive and well, but couldn’t find the exact words to say it. There were things in his head that were making it specifically difficult to be properly grateful, but Aiba knew it wasn’t the time, nor the place to think about them.
Especially since he still had no idea how this happened, how Nino ended up alive when they’ve just been mourning the pain of losing him, six years after his supposed death.
Or so they thought.
“I’m just worried,” he said, biting back the urge to cry once more. He’d already been chastised enough for crying, but Aiba knew it was inevitable, anyway. His tears come out no matter what he was feeling. And he was currently overwhelmed with emotion he couldn’t contain, so Nino would have to deal with it all, as payback for all the tears Aiba had willingly and unwillingly shed for Nino himself during the past six years thinking he was dead.
“Stop worrying, it’ll give you premature wrinkles,” Nino told him, jabbing a finger to Aiba’s forehead. “Which you already have, how odd.” Nino mused, leaning over for a closer look. Aiba blinked, stilled under Nino’s careful observation.
“Hey, have you been coloring your hair?” Nino asked, suddenly, fingering the strands of stubborn hair falling over Aiba’s eyes. “And I swear you had a different haircut the last time we saw each other, like, a week ago, right? And it’s this long now? How the hell did that happen?”
Aiba felt a tremor coming. It was obvious that the no one had yet to tell Nino what had happened to him, or how long he’d been in a coma. Aiba was certain he didn’t want it to be him.
“Umm, yeah? It’s a new trend, silly.”
“But I swear you had an almost military cut that time so how come -”
“Hair extensions! You haven’t heard of that, Nino-chan? Oh my god, seriously?” he countered, shoving his shaking fingers through his hair.
Nino gave him the stinky eye and pouted, crossing his arms tightly over his chest.
“I’m not blind, Aiba-chan,” Nino muttered, and Aiba was certain his heart was going mile a minute as sweat started gathering on his temple. “I know something is wrong, but the doctor wouldn’t tell me, and you’re obviously doing the same.” Nino said.
“I don’t really -”
“That accident, when did it happen? And why I couldn’t remember any of it? Is this scar in my forehead has something to do with it? Tell me or I swear I’ll choke it out of you.”
“Nino-chan, I -”
“Ninomiya-san, it’s time to take your medicine,” Nurse Kiritani announced from the doorway, and Aiba found himself gasping in relief as he shuffled out of her way.
Nino said nothing but the way he had locked gazes with Aiba told him this wasn’t going to end here.
It was high time he talked to Nino’s mother, then.
++
"I - I still don't understand how this is possible," Aiba whispered, watching his best friend sleeping on the bed, his hand clutching Nino’s wrist lightly as if he couldn’t bear to let him go even when he was certain Nino wasn’t going anywhere.
"I mean, we buried him." he hissed, low and gravely. “At least I thought we did.”
Aiba blinked, flooded with the memories of that painful day as if only happened yesterday. He didn’t even get to see Nino, because no one was allowed to anymore, after Nino was brought back home from the hospital morgue.
Aiba himself couldn’t believe it - he talked to Nino two days before the accident happened, after all, and finding out that he was going back home to his best friend’s funeral, of all things, obviously didn’t help.
“W-We did, right?” he murmured, eyes wide.
Of course, how could he be certain when Nino’s casket was kept closed all throughout the wake? Somehow, he vaguely remembered someone saying about Nino’s face being too bruised and swollen to be viewed that his family opted not to open the casket, and Aiba feeling all too overwhelmed with misery to even question it.
Nino's mother shifted from where she was sitting on the chair on Nino's left bedside, fingers stroking Nino's hair. After being awake only for an hour, Nino seemed to tire easily. The fact was enough for Nino's mother to worry immediately but the doctor - Sakurai-san - told them that it was just normal.
Nino was still recovering, he said, and sleeping was one of our body’s natural way of healing itself. Aiba was certain Kazuko-san wasn’t all that convinced, seeing that the older woman had stubbornly refused to leave Nino’s side until she was sure her son would wake up the second time around.
“No,” she said, her voice sounded emotionless.“We buried an empty casket.” was her simple reply, as if that would somehow answer everything.
Aiba honestly wondered how to tell her it was actually the opposite.
“Kaa-chan, you do realize -”
“I know, but it was the only thing I could think of then, Ma-kun,” she said, quickly cutting him off. “The doctors told me he wasn’t going to make it, anyway. So, I thought, why prolong the agony if I could spare you all the pain that I’d still have to suffer until the time he draws his last breath? It was going to happen anyway. Sure, his heart was still beating then, but the doctors were certain it would only be a matter of time till it stops, permanently.”
Aiba blinked, fingers tightening around Nino’s wrist. “But it didn’t.”
She shook her head but her gaze was on her son’s peacefully sleeping face on the bed.
“No, it didn’t,” she said. “He was so brave, fighting for his life even though everyone at the hospital thought I was foolish for doing the same. They kept telling me that even if he regains consciousness, he’ll only end up like a human vegetable - and that honestly was one of the reasons why I kept his condition a secret.” she paused her, wiping the tears that fell on her cheeks.
“I’d never want anyone to look at him like they’re sorry he’s alive, that he’d better off dead than to live miserably like the doctors predicted. As his mother, I couldn’t allow that, I just couldn’t. That’s why I did it.” she said, voice trembling.
“But Oh-chan wouldn’t have left Chiba if he knew Nino was alive,” he said, heart breaking. “He probably would have stayed by Nino’s side, and wouldn’t have found someone else to -”
“Maybe,” she cut him off again, her voice surprisingly clear. “But I’m certain that Kazu would have done the same if the decision was up to him. He wouldn’t want to keep Satoshi-kun waiting, knowing that the possibility of him recovering is close to nothing. Kazu wouldn’t ever want to tie Satoshi-kun to a promise he couldn’t keep himself, and it would be unfair to expect the same from Satoshi-kun.”
Aiba didn’t dare say anything in return, knowing that anything he might come up with then would mean nothing. There was no sense blaming her for her decisions, no matter how it could have changed the lives of all involved.
He simply ducked his head and nuzzled his best friend’s arm, closing his eyes and listening to each and every breath Nino took in his sleep, and feeling entirely grateful for hearing it.
That would be enough, for now.
