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nilielhTitle : [Fic] I Have Kept You In My Heart (Part 8)
Pairing : Ohno/Jun, Sho/Nino, Ohno/Nino, Eventual Jun/?
Rating : R
Summary : Before Jun, there was only Nino. The man Ohno loved with everything he had, loved with such ferocity that any other emotion would pale in comparison. He was Ohno's everything, the love of his life, the person Ohno dreamed of sharing his whole life with someday. Until Nino's untimely death, six years ago.
Disclaimer : fiction, yo!
Warning : Angst in large doses. Memory loss. Minor character death. One-sided love.
Sho just left Ninomiya-san’s room and was on his way to the second floor to check on another patient when Kiko-chan appeared, just as he was rounding the corner, calling his name.
“Sensei!
Sho frowned, then picked up the phase, meeting Kiko halfway. She was breathless when they both stopped, and Sho allowed her a few seconds to catch her breath before he spoke.
“Jesus, is the building on fire or what? Why do you have to run like that?” he teased.
Kiko shook her head, pursed her lips as if she was contemplating, then dropped her gaze. Sho noted the fact that Kiko looked slightly apologetic.
“Did something happen?” he asked, prompting her.
Kiko bowed slightly, and the gesture floored Sho even more. The only other time she bowed at him like this was when she ‘accidentally’ broke one of the balance balls in his office. With a scissor.
“Oh my god, what is it,” he said, dramatically, before putting his hands on either side of his hips.
“Okay, spill.”
Kiko’s grin was apologetic as it was sheepish. “You didn’t happen to see…Matsumoto-san again…after you… left to check on Ninomiya-san, did you?” she asked.
Matsumoto-san? What’s Matsumoto had to do with this? Sho shook his head at her in answer.
“No. I left him with you, didn’t I? You were supposed to schedule his upcoming visits, right?”
“Yes,” Kiko agreed, “but right after you left, he told me he just needed to buy a drink from the vending machine, he was so pale, mind you, then he said he’ll be back to arrange the schedule with me.”
Sho narrowed his eyes at her in suspicion. “But he didn’t come back.”
Kiko raised her hand, two fingers up in a peace sign. “Nope,” she said, “I’m really sorry, Sensei! I also tried looking around for him before calling him up, but he didn’t answer! Do you think he changed his mind? Is it because of me? Or you?”
Sho reached over and flicked her forehead lightly. She stepped back with an over-dramatic wince.
“I’ll have you know, Kiko-chan, that no client has ever turned me down after I have talked to them the first time, so I’m pretty certain it’s because of you. You’ve probably scared the shit out of him when we saw you suspended in mid-air earlier!”
“I honestly think I was pretty impressive.” she said, wagging her pretty brows at him.
“No, you were seriously terrifying,” Sho countered, only half-meaning it. He shuddered, remembering her skinny legs dangling on that ladder while she fixed something in the ceiling. “You terrify people, Kiko-chan, I swear to god. It won’t even surprise me to find that you ended up scaring Jun-san away, goodness.”
“That’s harsh, Sensei!”
Sho grinned and chose to ignore her jibe. “You have his number, right?” he asked; then to Kiko nodding her head in answer, he said, “Fine, give it to me later. I’ll try calling him using my phone.” he said.
Kiko smiled and fished something out from the back pockets of her pants, then handed it over. Sho frowned when he realized he was actually staring at his own mobile phone, which Sho was certain he left behind in his office - in his locked office - earlier.
“I thought you might need it so I did the courtesy of bringing it with me,” Kiko said, with a smile so wide she was showing all of her teeth. “And you just said you do, so, you’re welcome!” she said, turning completely around before Sho could even stop her.
She started skipping away when Sho remembered something, opening his mouth to call out after her when she beat him to it, again.
“Oh, and I’ve already saved Matsumoto Jun-san’s number there, okay, it’s fine, don’t mention it!” she said before disappearing in the corner she appeared.
Sho frowned at his phone and frowned at it some more when he realized something.
“HOW THE HELL DID SHE KNOW MY PASSCODE? OH MY GOD, THAT CRAZY WOMAN -”
+
Jun was thankfully conscious when Ohno arrived at the hospital, not even fifteen minutes later after he received the call, all thanks to Aiba’s kindness. The other man had kindly offered to drive Ohno to the hospital, and despite himself, Ohno agreed. He knew he should have declined, but as it was, there were obviously more important things than his pride or what propriety said he was allowed to do.
He didn’t invite Aiba to go with him, and he was grateful for the fact that Aiba didn’t ask for his permission to go, either. Aiba just told him to give him a call when everything’s settled on Ohno’s side, before saying goodbye. If Aiba purposely didn’t mention anything about Nino, Ohno opted not to call Aiba out on it.
Even though he was aching to, he couldn’t. Jun needed him now, and despite the fact that his heart had silently begged him to go and see Nino immediately, he knew he couldn’t. He couldn’t.
The emergency doctor who took immediate action to treat Jun was there when Ohno arrived. Luckily, the accident only left Jun with a few stitches on his temple, a slightly dislocated left elbow and some bruises. They weren’t major injuries that would require Jun to stay in the hospital, so despite Ohno’s earlier reluctance, Jun was already allowed to go home with him afterwards.
Jun was awake, but he seemed a little out of it when Ohno came to find him; he was just sitting on the bed there, looking far worse than how Ohno remembered seeing him last this morning - his bandaged arm, and equally bandaged head, the bruises on his right cheek and ear, and Ohno was struck with that unfamiliar ice knotting in his gut at the memory of seeing the same injuries, but on someone else’s face.
Wincing, he mentally chastised himself for doing so.
“Jun,” was the only thing Ohno had managed then, relief washing over him when Jun briefly glanced his way. He was glad Jun was alright and that he wasn’t badly injured, though there was a part of him that wondered what in hell happened. Jun was always a careful driver, after all, so it was really surprising that Jun would end up driving his car up against a road barrier and almost killing himself.
Jun was awake but he refused to talk to Ohno, even when Ohno came forward to check on him, to see how he was.He remained that way even when Ohno had come forward to hold Jun in his arms, kissing Jun’s uninjured temple even when Jun stayed uncharacteristically quiet and stiff inside the cradle of Ohno’s embrace.
Once he’d settled the bill, bought Jun’s medicines, and had gotten Jun’s discharge papers with so little fanfare, he took Jun’s hand in his with one hand and stoop down, thumbing the skin beneath Jun’s eyes with the other. Jun averted his gaze and his mouth twitched, as if he was going to say something, but he didn’t.
Ohno squeezed his eyes shut, pain and frustration mingling, and knew he was to blame for all of this as much as Jun was, for neglecting Jun, for being a complete asshole.
He sighed, chest hurting in a totally different way, knowing that it was only going to get worse from here on.
“Come on,” he whispered, dropping another kiss to Jun’s hair. “Let’s go home.”
++
It was half past three when Aiba made it back to Kodaira.
Somehow, it wasn’t even surprising that he ended up driving Ohno to Musashino Tokushukai Hospital in Nishitokyo, where Ohno’s boyfriend had apparently been admitted to, when he’d spontaneously spouted he’d drive Ohno there before he could even stop his traitorous mouth from talking.
Unsurprisingly, Ohno spoke too little during the short fifteen minute drive from the restaurant to the hospital, and Aiba had no choice but to hold off with the questions, knowing how specifically hard it was for Ohno then.
It would be totally cruel to make Ohno choose, and Aiba was certain he would have completely toed the line by asking Ohno why he was dropping everything to see Matsumoto-san, because that was understandable, wasn’t it?
That guy was Ohno’s significant other now, and no matter what everyone thought, Aiba included, that wasn’t going to change just because they all found out Nino was alive.
Right?
Aiba groaned inwardly, letting his head drop on the steering wheel with an almost inaudible thump, his exhaustion settling over him like second skin. Somehow, he wondered what kind of cruel fate these past few days turned out to be, remembering the chain of events that somehow brought them all right here. The circumstances that lead them to where they all were now, and the corresponding heartbreaking consequences they’re surely suffer later on.
Aiba squeezed his eyes shut and mentally recalled everything that happened up to this point; Nino’s literal return from the dead, his memories of Ohno missing, Aiba going out of his way to tell Ohno everything, before it all ended with a call from the hospital about Ohno’s present boyfriend’s accident.
Aiba had to take it all in stride, unable to do much else in the face of such awful turn of events. To be honest, he hadn’t expected coming back here without Ohno in tow, but he guessed it couldn’t be helped.
Ohno did seem like he wanted nothing but to go with Aiba, and Aiba had seen the look on Ohno’s face up-close to know that Ohno wasn’t faking it. On one hand, it was obvious to anyone with eyes that Ohno’s heart was torn between two things: to go to Nino and see him at once, and be with Matsumoto Jun and make sure the other man was alright.
To be honest, Aiba’s head hurt just thinking about it.
He sighed, felt the way his chest knotted with the urge to call Becky if only to hear her voice. He felt so out of his depth already, his nerves on edge and he knew that talking to her would help.
The decision was too easy, that he didn’t realize he was fishing around for his phone until he already had it in his hand. He straightened and swiped his thumb across the screen to unlock it, and startled when it started vibrating afterwards.
It was a call. From Kazuko-san.
Aiba only hesitated for all of two seconds before he tapped the screen to accept the call.
“Kaa-chan?”
Ma-kun? Sorry for bothering you…I mean, for calling you when I know where you’re supposed to be. Mmm, are you still with…with Satoshi-kun?
“It’s okay,” Aiba told her, as he took out his keys and wallet before he stepped out of the car and locked it. “and no, not anymore. I’m actually in the parking lot of the hospital now. I just arrived a few minutes ago. What is it?”
The next time she spoke, her voice sounded grave. Oh, have you talked to him then? What did he say? Is he… planning on visiting Kazu later?
Aiba started walking. “No, Kaa-chan,” he said, remembering yet again why that was the case. He sighed and decided to keep it all to himself, for now. “I - didn’t get to talk to him. He couldn’t make it. There was an urgent matter he had to attend to, so he had to…we had to re-schedule.”
Oh, I’m so sorry to hear that, she said, though she didn’t sound particularly bothered. Well, I just called to tell you some good news.
Aiba frowned. Good news? “What is it?”
Sakurai-Sensei had just handed over Kazu’s medical test results, she said, and this time she actually sounded genuinely excited, cheerful.
“Yeah?”
Yes. And that we have nothing to worry about because the results came out better than he’d expected. Oh, and we’re allowed to take him home as early as tomorrow. They had to schedule Kazu’s rehabilitation later today, and then he’s free to go.
Aiba let go of the breath he didn’t realize he was holding, and allowed himself a smile despite how shaky he felt. Everything seemed like they’re catching up on him so fast he was finding it difficult to keep up.
“That’s fantastic, Kaa-chan.” he said, his voice shaking like the rest of him, and Aiba knew it was the overwhelming emotion talking. That was all there was to it, he told himself, and not at all the accompanying regret he’d been quietly keeping to himself eversince he left Musashino Hospital without Ohno.
But he guessed that’s just how it was. He just had to accept things as they were, he supposed.
I thought so, too, she said. Ah, well, I guess I have no choice but to call Kazue, tell her the good news. I supposed I should, since I’ve decided it would be better not to take Kazu back to Chiba.
“Eh? What do you mean?”
Until I’m certain my son’s life is no longer in danger, he’s not going back there, Ma-kun. No matter what he or anyone says. Right now, his safety is my priority, and it will stay that way until he recovers his memories and could finally tell us what exactly happened to him that day. Until then, he will stay wherever I tell him to, she said firmly, and with finality.
Aiba heaved a sigh, only belatedly realizing he’s standing in front of the elevator’s door.
“If that’s what you think is best to keep Nino safe, then do it, Kaa-chan.” he said, knowing that there was no use arguing with her. Not that he wanted to, because he didn’t. He couldn’t even begin to think how hard it must have been for her to keep all of this to herself, and who was he to question her and her decisions?
Thank you, Ma-kun, she said. Anyway, I was also going to ask you if you had lunch already because I haven’t yet, but then I realized it’s way past -
“No, not yet, actually,” he said, cutting her off. As if on cue, his stomach growled loudly, as if to remind him he hadn’t fed himself yet. “I’ll go buy us lunch, then. Be there in a bit, okay?” he said, before ending the call.
He turned completely around just as pocketed his phone, mentally reminding himself to be grateful for every little thing that mattered, even those that didn’t, knowing he’d encountered a lot these past few days. There were disappointing ones, too, and he knew he had to be thankful for them as well. They might have not worked out this time around, but Aiba knew that in time, someday, they would.
He just had to trust in them to work themselves out in the end, to be where they’re supposed to be. Aiba already did his part; all he had to do now was wait it all out and hope for the best.
++
When Sho called Matsumoto Jun the first three times, his phone was off. It finally rang when he tried again about half an hour later, but there was no answer.
He was just stepping inside his office when he felt his phone vibrating in his robe’s pocket, and when he took it out, he saw Jun’s name blinking on the screen.
He hesitated only a moment, before he was tapping the Accept icon and slapping his phone against his left ear to answer the call. “Hello?” he said, then frowned, hearing an unfamiliar voice answering from the other end.
He pulled the phone away from his ears for a bit only so he could squint at the name on the screen. Matsumoto Jun-san, it said. Did Kiko-chan mistook someone else’s phone number as Matsumoto-san’s?
He put the phone back against his ear and cleared his throat. “Um, I’m sorry, I thought I was calling Matsumoto Jun-san’s phone,” he started with an apology, already imagining verbally boxing Kiko-chan’s ears after this call. “I mean, obviously this isn’t -”
It’s his phone, the man from the other end said, and Sho noted the fact that the man sounded distant, probably even a touche exhausted. Who is this?
Sho cleared his throat again. “Oh, I’m sorry. I’m Doctor Sakurai Sho, resident Neuropsychologist from the National Center of Neurology and Psychiatry located here in Kodaira. I’m actually calling to check on Matsumoto-san -”
A Neuropsychologist? I thought Jun was seeing a Psychiatrist, and as far as I could remember, his name isn’t Sakurai Sho but Takahashi Something-san. Who are you?
Sho did his best to be polite despite the obvious rudeness, biting his tongue and mentally counting from one to ten quickly.
“Ah, I don’t mean to disrespect, Mister, but if this is really Matsumoto-san’s phone, don’t you think it’s just proper that you pass him the phone so I could talk to him? I don’t know who you are, either, although you couldn’t say the same to me, since I have already introduced myself to you earlier.” Sho said, keeping his voice even, letting years of training take over despite his annoyance.
I’m Ohno. Jun’s had an accident and he couldn’t talk on the phone right now. But I’ll make sure to pass the message, Sakurai-Sensei, the man said from the other line, before he hung up.
Sho blinked, then stared at his phone without actually seeing it.
Accident? Matsumoto Jun-san had an accident? What the hell just happened?
++
Ohno frowned at the phone in his hand - Jun’s phone, which miraculously came out from the accident unscathed - for a moment longer before he decided to put it down, setting it next to Jun’s apartment keys, his watch and his rings. Walking further inside, he found Jun on the couch, his head resting on the couch’s arm with his eyes closed.
He sat on the single-seater there, on Jun’s left, and cleared his throat. Jun barely reacted, obviously still opting on ignoring him.
“I didn’t know you’ve changed doctors,” he said, deciding on catching Jun off-guard instead of asking Jun the obvious. As expected, Jun popped his eyes open, gaze quickly darting towards him as if Jun had always known he was there.
“He called, said his name was Sakurai Sho, a Neuropsychologist,” he continued, “What happened to Takahashi-Sensei?”
“I’m surprised you knew,” Jun said, mockingly, answering neither of Ohno’s questions. “Or did you just find out when you talked to Sakurai-Sensei?”
He chuckled, shaking his head. “I supposed I should be offended, hearing that you thought I didn’t,” he said, “I mean, you really thought I had no idea that you’re…sick?”
“I’m not sick,” Jun countered quickly, the venom in his voice mirrored the one on his eyes. “I’m not, okay? It’s not what you think -”
“I know about the medications, Jun,” he cut in, hoping he sounded as sorry as he felt. He wondered why he didn’t tell Jun before, when he could have done so before now, what had stopped him then when he’d even went as far as meeting Takahashi-Sensei himself to know how Jun was doing. “And I’ve also visited Takahashi-Sensei several times to…to check on you.”
“Wow,” Jun exclaimed, straightening from his spot on the couch. “I don’t know what to say to you, really. I mean, seriously? You’re saying this to me now, of all the fucking times, really? But you know what, it doesn’t matter anymore. You could say anything you want, now, anything to make you feel better about all this crap you’ve put between us but it’s not going to change anything, you hear me?”
He frowned, confused. “What are you even saying?” he said, as he huffed mirthlessly at the same time he stood. He honestly had no idea what was going on, what Jun was saying.
“Seriously, are you okay?” he followed when he was close enough to put his hands on Jun’s face and forearms, only to be roughly pushed away when Jun stood, too. He stumbled backwards, and it was only through his quick reflex that he was able to prevent himself from falling over, catching himself halfway.
“What the hell - Jun, what’s going on -” he said, reaching over yet again, with all the intention of putting his hands anywhere near Jun, but Jun simply shoved him away. Ohno stumbled yet again, the difference on their height and weight clearly working on Jun’s favor this time.
“Get your hands off me, you bastard!” Jun screamed. “You knew he was alive! You’ve known it all along, and that’s why you’ve always been so so distant! You knew he was coming back, didn’t you? You used me! You just used me, you fucking bastard! Get away from me! Get your dirty hands away from me!”
++
“So, have you called Kazue Nee-chan?” Aiba remembered to ask while Kazuko-san was putting the take-out boxes away. They’ve eaten their (late) lunches in silence, and once done, Aiba didn’t realize he’d migrated on the chair next to Nino’s bed, to watch Nino sleep.
“No,” she answered without glancing back, just as she was carefully tying the garbage bag with the empty takeout boxes. “I called her husband instead.” she added, and Aiba noticed the glee in her voice when she said it. She must be imagining the ensuing drama that was surely going to happen after the revelation, but if not, then it was no surprise where Nino had gotten that evil side of him after all.
“Then it would be better to expect her bursting into that door anytime soon,” he said, chuckling, “Knowing her, we might even need to alert the hospital security. What do you think?”
“I told her husband to keep the sedative ready, just in case she gets violent, but let’s hope he won’t need it.” she countered, her voice quaking with silent mischief. Aiba found himself giggling with her, without him realizing it.
“What about Satoshi-kun? You said you didn’t get to meet him?” she segued, putting the garbage bag aside. “Does that mean you also didn’t get to tell him about…about Kazu?”
Aiba blinked, then darted his gaze elsewhere. What was the use of lying, really, when he was certain Kazuko-san was so much better at reading him. She was just as good as her son at it, and Aiba never stood a chance.
“I - Well, he’s not… I mean, we didn’t get to -”
“Ma-kun, it’s okay,” she said, and when Aiba raised his head to meet her gaze, he realized she meant it, too. “If Satoshi-kun decided he didn’t want to see my son, then so be it. I mean, I understand if he can’t. He’s with someone now, and it’s been years since Kazu’s apparent death; it’s understandable that he’s -”
Aiba held out a hand and shook his head. “No no no, it’s not like that, Kaa-chan,” he countered quickly, “I - Oh-chan wants to…he badly wants to come….and see Nino-chan but his…there’s an urgent matter he really, really needs to take care of first. But he…he’ll come to…to see Nino, once he’s able to. I swear, it’s…there’s nothing he wants more than to see Nino, but it’s just…it’s difficult. But he promised he’ll call me once that matter is settled, and I’m sure he will. Oh-chan is…Oh-chan loved Nino with all of his heart, Kaa-chan, and just because he has someone else in his life now doesn’t mean he stopped loving Nino, because he didn’t. He doesn’t. Oh-chan still -” Aiba said without pause, only to be stopped when another voice joined itself in the conversation and thus rendering Aiba speechless as he slowly whipped his head around to find Nino very much awake on the bed, and frowning.
“I’m asking you, Aiba-shii,” Nino said, “Who’s Oh-chan?”
Pairing : Ohno/Jun, Sho/Nino, Ohno/Nino, Eventual Jun/?
Rating : R
Summary : Before Jun, there was only Nino. The man Ohno loved with everything he had, loved with such ferocity that any other emotion would pale in comparison. He was Ohno's everything, the love of his life, the person Ohno dreamed of sharing his whole life with someday. Until Nino's untimely death, six years ago.
Disclaimer : fiction, yo!
Warning : Angst in large doses. Memory loss. Minor character death. One-sided love.
Sho just left Ninomiya-san’s room and was on his way to the second floor to check on another patient when Kiko-chan appeared, just as he was rounding the corner, calling his name.
“Sensei!
Sho frowned, then picked up the phase, meeting Kiko halfway. She was breathless when they both stopped, and Sho allowed her a few seconds to catch her breath before he spoke.
“Jesus, is the building on fire or what? Why do you have to run like that?” he teased.
Kiko shook her head, pursed her lips as if she was contemplating, then dropped her gaze. Sho noted the fact that Kiko looked slightly apologetic.
“Did something happen?” he asked, prompting her.
Kiko bowed slightly, and the gesture floored Sho even more. The only other time she bowed at him like this was when she ‘accidentally’ broke one of the balance balls in his office. With a scissor.
“Oh my god, what is it,” he said, dramatically, before putting his hands on either side of his hips.
“Okay, spill.”
Kiko’s grin was apologetic as it was sheepish. “You didn’t happen to see…Matsumoto-san again…after you… left to check on Ninomiya-san, did you?” she asked.
Matsumoto-san? What’s Matsumoto had to do with this? Sho shook his head at her in answer.
“No. I left him with you, didn’t I? You were supposed to schedule his upcoming visits, right?”
“Yes,” Kiko agreed, “but right after you left, he told me he just needed to buy a drink from the vending machine, he was so pale, mind you, then he said he’ll be back to arrange the schedule with me.”
Sho narrowed his eyes at her in suspicion. “But he didn’t come back.”
Kiko raised her hand, two fingers up in a peace sign. “Nope,” she said, “I’m really sorry, Sensei! I also tried looking around for him before calling him up, but he didn’t answer! Do you think he changed his mind? Is it because of me? Or you?”
Sho reached over and flicked her forehead lightly. She stepped back with an over-dramatic wince.
“I’ll have you know, Kiko-chan, that no client has ever turned me down after I have talked to them the first time, so I’m pretty certain it’s because of you. You’ve probably scared the shit out of him when we saw you suspended in mid-air earlier!”
“I honestly think I was pretty impressive.” she said, wagging her pretty brows at him.
“No, you were seriously terrifying,” Sho countered, only half-meaning it. He shuddered, remembering her skinny legs dangling on that ladder while she fixed something in the ceiling. “You terrify people, Kiko-chan, I swear to god. It won’t even surprise me to find that you ended up scaring Jun-san away, goodness.”
“That’s harsh, Sensei!”
Sho grinned and chose to ignore her jibe. “You have his number, right?” he asked; then to Kiko nodding her head in answer, he said, “Fine, give it to me later. I’ll try calling him using my phone.” he said.
Kiko smiled and fished something out from the back pockets of her pants, then handed it over. Sho frowned when he realized he was actually staring at his own mobile phone, which Sho was certain he left behind in his office - in his locked office - earlier.
“I thought you might need it so I did the courtesy of bringing it with me,” Kiko said, with a smile so wide she was showing all of her teeth. “And you just said you do, so, you’re welcome!” she said, turning completely around before Sho could even stop her.
She started skipping away when Sho remembered something, opening his mouth to call out after her when she beat him to it, again.
“Oh, and I’ve already saved Matsumoto Jun-san’s number there, okay, it’s fine, don’t mention it!” she said before disappearing in the corner she appeared.
Sho frowned at his phone and frowned at it some more when he realized something.
“HOW THE HELL DID SHE KNOW MY PASSCODE? OH MY GOD, THAT CRAZY WOMAN -”
+
Jun was thankfully conscious when Ohno arrived at the hospital, not even fifteen minutes later after he received the call, all thanks to Aiba’s kindness. The other man had kindly offered to drive Ohno to the hospital, and despite himself, Ohno agreed. He knew he should have declined, but as it was, there were obviously more important things than his pride or what propriety said he was allowed to do.
He didn’t invite Aiba to go with him, and he was grateful for the fact that Aiba didn’t ask for his permission to go, either. Aiba just told him to give him a call when everything’s settled on Ohno’s side, before saying goodbye. If Aiba purposely didn’t mention anything about Nino, Ohno opted not to call Aiba out on it.
Even though he was aching to, he couldn’t. Jun needed him now, and despite the fact that his heart had silently begged him to go and see Nino immediately, he knew he couldn’t. He couldn’t.
The emergency doctor who took immediate action to treat Jun was there when Ohno arrived. Luckily, the accident only left Jun with a few stitches on his temple, a slightly dislocated left elbow and some bruises. They weren’t major injuries that would require Jun to stay in the hospital, so despite Ohno’s earlier reluctance, Jun was already allowed to go home with him afterwards.
Jun was awake, but he seemed a little out of it when Ohno came to find him; he was just sitting on the bed there, looking far worse than how Ohno remembered seeing him last this morning - his bandaged arm, and equally bandaged head, the bruises on his right cheek and ear, and Ohno was struck with that unfamiliar ice knotting in his gut at the memory of seeing the same injuries, but on someone else’s face.
Wincing, he mentally chastised himself for doing so.
“Jun,” was the only thing Ohno had managed then, relief washing over him when Jun briefly glanced his way. He was glad Jun was alright and that he wasn’t badly injured, though there was a part of him that wondered what in hell happened. Jun was always a careful driver, after all, so it was really surprising that Jun would end up driving his car up against a road barrier and almost killing himself.
Jun was awake but he refused to talk to Ohno, even when Ohno came forward to check on him, to see how he was.He remained that way even when Ohno had come forward to hold Jun in his arms, kissing Jun’s uninjured temple even when Jun stayed uncharacteristically quiet and stiff inside the cradle of Ohno’s embrace.
Once he’d settled the bill, bought Jun’s medicines, and had gotten Jun’s discharge papers with so little fanfare, he took Jun’s hand in his with one hand and stoop down, thumbing the skin beneath Jun’s eyes with the other. Jun averted his gaze and his mouth twitched, as if he was going to say something, but he didn’t.
Ohno squeezed his eyes shut, pain and frustration mingling, and knew he was to blame for all of this as much as Jun was, for neglecting Jun, for being a complete asshole.
He sighed, chest hurting in a totally different way, knowing that it was only going to get worse from here on.
“Come on,” he whispered, dropping another kiss to Jun’s hair. “Let’s go home.”
++
It was half past three when Aiba made it back to Kodaira.
Somehow, it wasn’t even surprising that he ended up driving Ohno to Musashino Tokushukai Hospital in Nishitokyo, where Ohno’s boyfriend had apparently been admitted to, when he’d spontaneously spouted he’d drive Ohno there before he could even stop his traitorous mouth from talking.
Unsurprisingly, Ohno spoke too little during the short fifteen minute drive from the restaurant to the hospital, and Aiba had no choice but to hold off with the questions, knowing how specifically hard it was for Ohno then.
It would be totally cruel to make Ohno choose, and Aiba was certain he would have completely toed the line by asking Ohno why he was dropping everything to see Matsumoto-san, because that was understandable, wasn’t it?
That guy was Ohno’s significant other now, and no matter what everyone thought, Aiba included, that wasn’t going to change just because they all found out Nino was alive.
Right?
Aiba groaned inwardly, letting his head drop on the steering wheel with an almost inaudible thump, his exhaustion settling over him like second skin. Somehow, he wondered what kind of cruel fate these past few days turned out to be, remembering the chain of events that somehow brought them all right here. The circumstances that lead them to where they all were now, and the corresponding heartbreaking consequences they’re surely suffer later on.
Aiba squeezed his eyes shut and mentally recalled everything that happened up to this point; Nino’s literal return from the dead, his memories of Ohno missing, Aiba going out of his way to tell Ohno everything, before it all ended with a call from the hospital about Ohno’s present boyfriend’s accident.
Aiba had to take it all in stride, unable to do much else in the face of such awful turn of events. To be honest, he hadn’t expected coming back here without Ohno in tow, but he guessed it couldn’t be helped.
Ohno did seem like he wanted nothing but to go with Aiba, and Aiba had seen the look on Ohno’s face up-close to know that Ohno wasn’t faking it. On one hand, it was obvious to anyone with eyes that Ohno’s heart was torn between two things: to go to Nino and see him at once, and be with Matsumoto Jun and make sure the other man was alright.
To be honest, Aiba’s head hurt just thinking about it.
He sighed, felt the way his chest knotted with the urge to call Becky if only to hear her voice. He felt so out of his depth already, his nerves on edge and he knew that talking to her would help.
The decision was too easy, that he didn’t realize he was fishing around for his phone until he already had it in his hand. He straightened and swiped his thumb across the screen to unlock it, and startled when it started vibrating afterwards.
It was a call. From Kazuko-san.
Aiba only hesitated for all of two seconds before he tapped the screen to accept the call.
“Kaa-chan?”
Ma-kun? Sorry for bothering you…I mean, for calling you when I know where you’re supposed to be. Mmm, are you still with…with Satoshi-kun?
“It’s okay,” Aiba told her, as he took out his keys and wallet before he stepped out of the car and locked it. “and no, not anymore. I’m actually in the parking lot of the hospital now. I just arrived a few minutes ago. What is it?”
The next time she spoke, her voice sounded grave. Oh, have you talked to him then? What did he say? Is he… planning on visiting Kazu later?
Aiba started walking. “No, Kaa-chan,” he said, remembering yet again why that was the case. He sighed and decided to keep it all to himself, for now. “I - didn’t get to talk to him. He couldn’t make it. There was an urgent matter he had to attend to, so he had to…we had to re-schedule.”
Oh, I’m so sorry to hear that, she said, though she didn’t sound particularly bothered. Well, I just called to tell you some good news.
Aiba frowned. Good news? “What is it?”
Sakurai-Sensei had just handed over Kazu’s medical test results, she said, and this time she actually sounded genuinely excited, cheerful.
“Yeah?”
Yes. And that we have nothing to worry about because the results came out better than he’d expected. Oh, and we’re allowed to take him home as early as tomorrow. They had to schedule Kazu’s rehabilitation later today, and then he’s free to go.
Aiba let go of the breath he didn’t realize he was holding, and allowed himself a smile despite how shaky he felt. Everything seemed like they’re catching up on him so fast he was finding it difficult to keep up.
“That’s fantastic, Kaa-chan.” he said, his voice shaking like the rest of him, and Aiba knew it was the overwhelming emotion talking. That was all there was to it, he told himself, and not at all the accompanying regret he’d been quietly keeping to himself eversince he left Musashino Hospital without Ohno.
But he guessed that’s just how it was. He just had to accept things as they were, he supposed.
I thought so, too, she said. Ah, well, I guess I have no choice but to call Kazue, tell her the good news. I supposed I should, since I’ve decided it would be better not to take Kazu back to Chiba.
“Eh? What do you mean?”
Until I’m certain my son’s life is no longer in danger, he’s not going back there, Ma-kun. No matter what he or anyone says. Right now, his safety is my priority, and it will stay that way until he recovers his memories and could finally tell us what exactly happened to him that day. Until then, he will stay wherever I tell him to, she said firmly, and with finality.
Aiba heaved a sigh, only belatedly realizing he’s standing in front of the elevator’s door.
“If that’s what you think is best to keep Nino safe, then do it, Kaa-chan.” he said, knowing that there was no use arguing with her. Not that he wanted to, because he didn’t. He couldn’t even begin to think how hard it must have been for her to keep all of this to herself, and who was he to question her and her decisions?
Thank you, Ma-kun, she said. Anyway, I was also going to ask you if you had lunch already because I haven’t yet, but then I realized it’s way past -
“No, not yet, actually,” he said, cutting her off. As if on cue, his stomach growled loudly, as if to remind him he hadn’t fed himself yet. “I’ll go buy us lunch, then. Be there in a bit, okay?” he said, before ending the call.
He turned completely around just as pocketed his phone, mentally reminding himself to be grateful for every little thing that mattered, even those that didn’t, knowing he’d encountered a lot these past few days. There were disappointing ones, too, and he knew he had to be thankful for them as well. They might have not worked out this time around, but Aiba knew that in time, someday, they would.
He just had to trust in them to work themselves out in the end, to be where they’re supposed to be. Aiba already did his part; all he had to do now was wait it all out and hope for the best.
++
When Sho called Matsumoto Jun the first three times, his phone was off. It finally rang when he tried again about half an hour later, but there was no answer.
He was just stepping inside his office when he felt his phone vibrating in his robe’s pocket, and when he took it out, he saw Jun’s name blinking on the screen.
He hesitated only a moment, before he was tapping the Accept icon and slapping his phone against his left ear to answer the call. “Hello?” he said, then frowned, hearing an unfamiliar voice answering from the other end.
He pulled the phone away from his ears for a bit only so he could squint at the name on the screen. Matsumoto Jun-san, it said. Did Kiko-chan mistook someone else’s phone number as Matsumoto-san’s?
He put the phone back against his ear and cleared his throat. “Um, I’m sorry, I thought I was calling Matsumoto Jun-san’s phone,” he started with an apology, already imagining verbally boxing Kiko-chan’s ears after this call. “I mean, obviously this isn’t -”
It’s his phone, the man from the other end said, and Sho noted the fact that the man sounded distant, probably even a touche exhausted. Who is this?
Sho cleared his throat again. “Oh, I’m sorry. I’m Doctor Sakurai Sho, resident Neuropsychologist from the National Center of Neurology and Psychiatry located here in Kodaira. I’m actually calling to check on Matsumoto-san -”
A Neuropsychologist? I thought Jun was seeing a Psychiatrist, and as far as I could remember, his name isn’t Sakurai Sho but Takahashi Something-san. Who are you?
Sho did his best to be polite despite the obvious rudeness, biting his tongue and mentally counting from one to ten quickly.
“Ah, I don’t mean to disrespect, Mister, but if this is really Matsumoto-san’s phone, don’t you think it’s just proper that you pass him the phone so I could talk to him? I don’t know who you are, either, although you couldn’t say the same to me, since I have already introduced myself to you earlier.” Sho said, keeping his voice even, letting years of training take over despite his annoyance.
I’m Ohno. Jun’s had an accident and he couldn’t talk on the phone right now. But I’ll make sure to pass the message, Sakurai-Sensei, the man said from the other line, before he hung up.
Sho blinked, then stared at his phone without actually seeing it.
Accident? Matsumoto Jun-san had an accident? What the hell just happened?
++
Ohno frowned at the phone in his hand - Jun’s phone, which miraculously came out from the accident unscathed - for a moment longer before he decided to put it down, setting it next to Jun’s apartment keys, his watch and his rings. Walking further inside, he found Jun on the couch, his head resting on the couch’s arm with his eyes closed.
He sat on the single-seater there, on Jun’s left, and cleared his throat. Jun barely reacted, obviously still opting on ignoring him.
“I didn’t know you’ve changed doctors,” he said, deciding on catching Jun off-guard instead of asking Jun the obvious. As expected, Jun popped his eyes open, gaze quickly darting towards him as if Jun had always known he was there.
“He called, said his name was Sakurai Sho, a Neuropsychologist,” he continued, “What happened to Takahashi-Sensei?”
“I’m surprised you knew,” Jun said, mockingly, answering neither of Ohno’s questions. “Or did you just find out when you talked to Sakurai-Sensei?”
He chuckled, shaking his head. “I supposed I should be offended, hearing that you thought I didn’t,” he said, “I mean, you really thought I had no idea that you’re…sick?”
“I’m not sick,” Jun countered quickly, the venom in his voice mirrored the one on his eyes. “I’m not, okay? It’s not what you think -”
“I know about the medications, Jun,” he cut in, hoping he sounded as sorry as he felt. He wondered why he didn’t tell Jun before, when he could have done so before now, what had stopped him then when he’d even went as far as meeting Takahashi-Sensei himself to know how Jun was doing. “And I’ve also visited Takahashi-Sensei several times to…to check on you.”
“Wow,” Jun exclaimed, straightening from his spot on the couch. “I don’t know what to say to you, really. I mean, seriously? You’re saying this to me now, of all the fucking times, really? But you know what, it doesn’t matter anymore. You could say anything you want, now, anything to make you feel better about all this crap you’ve put between us but it’s not going to change anything, you hear me?”
He frowned, confused. “What are you even saying?” he said, as he huffed mirthlessly at the same time he stood. He honestly had no idea what was going on, what Jun was saying.
“Seriously, are you okay?” he followed when he was close enough to put his hands on Jun’s face and forearms, only to be roughly pushed away when Jun stood, too. He stumbled backwards, and it was only through his quick reflex that he was able to prevent himself from falling over, catching himself halfway.
“What the hell - Jun, what’s going on -” he said, reaching over yet again, with all the intention of putting his hands anywhere near Jun, but Jun simply shoved him away. Ohno stumbled yet again, the difference on their height and weight clearly working on Jun’s favor this time.
“Get your hands off me, you bastard!” Jun screamed. “You knew he was alive! You’ve known it all along, and that’s why you’ve always been so so distant! You knew he was coming back, didn’t you? You used me! You just used me, you fucking bastard! Get away from me! Get your dirty hands away from me!”
++
“So, have you called Kazue Nee-chan?” Aiba remembered to ask while Kazuko-san was putting the take-out boxes away. They’ve eaten their (late) lunches in silence, and once done, Aiba didn’t realize he’d migrated on the chair next to Nino’s bed, to watch Nino sleep.
“No,” she answered without glancing back, just as she was carefully tying the garbage bag with the empty takeout boxes. “I called her husband instead.” she added, and Aiba noticed the glee in her voice when she said it. She must be imagining the ensuing drama that was surely going to happen after the revelation, but if not, then it was no surprise where Nino had gotten that evil side of him after all.
“Then it would be better to expect her bursting into that door anytime soon,” he said, chuckling, “Knowing her, we might even need to alert the hospital security. What do you think?”
“I told her husband to keep the sedative ready, just in case she gets violent, but let’s hope he won’t need it.” she countered, her voice quaking with silent mischief. Aiba found himself giggling with her, without him realizing it.
“What about Satoshi-kun? You said you didn’t get to meet him?” she segued, putting the garbage bag aside. “Does that mean you also didn’t get to tell him about…about Kazu?”
Aiba blinked, then darted his gaze elsewhere. What was the use of lying, really, when he was certain Kazuko-san was so much better at reading him. She was just as good as her son at it, and Aiba never stood a chance.
“I - Well, he’s not… I mean, we didn’t get to -”
“Ma-kun, it’s okay,” she said, and when Aiba raised his head to meet her gaze, he realized she meant it, too. “If Satoshi-kun decided he didn’t want to see my son, then so be it. I mean, I understand if he can’t. He’s with someone now, and it’s been years since Kazu’s apparent death; it’s understandable that he’s -”
Aiba held out a hand and shook his head. “No no no, it’s not like that, Kaa-chan,” he countered quickly, “I - Oh-chan wants to…he badly wants to come….and see Nino-chan but his…there’s an urgent matter he really, really needs to take care of first. But he…he’ll come to…to see Nino, once he’s able to. I swear, it’s…there’s nothing he wants more than to see Nino, but it’s just…it’s difficult. But he promised he’ll call me once that matter is settled, and I’m sure he will. Oh-chan is…Oh-chan loved Nino with all of his heart, Kaa-chan, and just because he has someone else in his life now doesn’t mean he stopped loving Nino, because he didn’t. He doesn’t. Oh-chan still -” Aiba said without pause, only to be stopped when another voice joined itself in the conversation and thus rendering Aiba speechless as he slowly whipped his head around to find Nino very much awake on the bed, and frowning.
“I’m asking you, Aiba-shii,” Nino said, “Who’s Oh-chan?”
