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nilielhTitle : [Fic] I Have Kept You In My Heart (Part 9)
Pairing : Ohno/Jun, Sho/Nino, Ohno/Nino, Eventual Jun/?
Rating : R
Summary : Before Jun, there was only Nino. The man Ohno loved with everything he had, loved with such ferocity that any other emotion would pale in comparison. He was Ohno's everything, the love of his life, the person Ohno dreamed of sharing his whole life with someday. Until Nino's untimely death, six years ago.
Disclaimer : fiction, yo!
Warning : Angst in large doses. Memory loss. Minor character death. One-sided love.
“W-What - H-How did you even -” Ohno stuttered, eyes wide in shock, and Jun laughed, loud and mirthless, found himself momentarily gloating at the sight, but it was only short-lived. The pain of Ohno’s betrayal registered soon after, as he took a step back, shaking as he watched Ohno stumbled back up on his feet with just the slightest bit of difficulty.
“Know that your ex is alive?” he cut in, his voice tinged with contempt. “You won’t believe it even if I tell you,” he added, mouth twitching. “But just so you know, it was pure coincidence. I guess someone up there took pity on me and had decided it was high time I realize how foolish I’ve been for hoping that you and I will -” he paused and shook his head, willing the words out despite the difficulty.
He breathed through his nose and willed himself to proceed.
“Well, I guess I was wrong.” he finished, taking another step back when Ohno countered the motion by walking forward, hand stretched.
“Jun, listen, you got this all wrong,” Ohno said, “I mean, I had no idea either! I was as surprised as you are, I swear! If it wasn’t for Aiba-chan -”
“Oh, so now you’re lying,” Jun gritted, “if you think you can fool me again by doing so, you’re terribly mistaken, Satoshi.” he added, tasting bile on his tongue.
Ohno seemed to have recovered himself when Jun started to turn away, catching him by his elbow and tugging him around.
“Jun, please! Won’t you hear me out? I told you, you’ve got this all wrong! I had no idea Kazu was alive, for fuck’s sake! Because if I did, I swear to you, we wouldn’t be here arguing over this! There was no way -” Ohno half-yelled, then probably realized the implication of what he just said so he stopped, but it was too late.
Jun’s heard enough.
“Of course, you wouldn’t, I get it,” he murmured, roughly tugging his arm away from Ohno’s vice-like grip. “There was no way you’d end up stuck here with me if you knew he was alive, right? Well, that’s just too bad, Satoshi.”
“God, are you even listening to me, Jun? Fuck, you’re twisting everything I’m saying into something awful and I swear I don’t even know how to phrase myself properly anymore! I don’t even know how to explain myself without you judging me in every turn! God!”
Jun huffed, his whole body throbbing with pain, from inside out. Somehow, this argument itself couldn’t even compare to the painful ordeal he’d went through earlier, when he crashed his car and wondered if he was going to die.
“I’ve got no strength left in me to indulge you and your lies, Satoshi,” he rasped, exhaustion settling over his bones. All the fight left him and the only thing he wanted now was to lie down and sleep this off, hoping that by the time he woke up, things had gone back to how they were before.
“Do whatever you want, I don’t care anymore. I’m tired. I’m just so tired.” he followed, leaving no room for Ohno to reply as he walked towards the bedroom, stepped inside and locked the door behind him.
+
Sho paced around in his office, his phone in hand and feeling quite distressed over the fact that Jun-san hadn’t called yet.
The person on the other end had said he would pass the message to Jun-san after all, so Sho had been expecting Jun-san’s call, but still no luck. Almost an hour passed and yet Sho’s phone remained quiet, and Sho didn’t want to admit that he was getting increasingly worried with every second that ticked by.
It was difficult to convince himself that nothing was wrong, especially after the man who answered Jun-san’s phone had told him Jun-san was involved in an accident. He knew that worrying wouldn’t help much, but he guessed that was just to be expected, given his history as a doctor.
He chuckled to himself and decided to distract himself for now. After all, he could always call Jun-san back himself, in a few hours at least, if he still didn’t receive one from the other man.
He’d go and check in with Ninomiya-san for now, already found himself in a better mood with his decision, as he headed for the door but not before making sure he’d got his phone safely tucked into the pockets of his pants, just to be safe.
+
Ohno didn’t think it would all come to this.
He watched, helpless, as Jun retreated to the bedroom to seclude himself, his pain evident in the way he’d regarded Ohno with smiles that didn’t quite reach his eyes. Ohno didn’t know what else to do, to say, to make Jun understand that he was as shocked at the revelation as Jun was, because it was clear that Jun was hurt beyond comprehension that he couldn’t think clearly.
Ohno would have wanted to explain his side, but what good would it do if Jun had already made up his mind about all this? About him?
He groaned mentally as he cradled his head in his hands, and willed it all away . It didn’t, because there was no escaping the fact that he was at fault here, too. Probably more than he’d dared to admit. He’d hurt Jun by saying the things he did, for doing the things he did, for not giving Jun the love he deserved, because he was an idiot.
An idiot who was obviously still in love with the same person he thought had died six years ago.
God, but what were the odds? He’d never, not even once since Nino’s apparent death, allowed himself the luxury to even imagine what could his life be if Nino was alive, because it was painful, just thinking about it. He’d often catch himself remembering Nino and the first thing he would do was to stray away from it as much as he could.
Doing so had kept him from going insane, and by then, he thought that it was pretty effective. The years had dulled the pain, yes, but it was still there, lying dormant underneath everything he’d chosen to pile above it, just so he wouldn’t have to confront it again.
At least until now.
He was given no other choice, after all. And it was honestly difficult not to feel elated hearing the news straight from Aiba-chan’s lips, even before he’d seen the photos and videos. The truth was, during that moment, he’d forgotten himself - his present, as he allowed himself to be brought back to the past. The past where there was only Nino.
For a moment there, he’d completely forgotten about Jun.
Saying that he was surprised was understatement. Discovering that the love of his life he thought had died had been alive all this time sure left an impact, one that would certainly trigger life-altering changes to Ohno from here on, and that there was absolutely nothing he could do to stop it.
He knew, because he was already having troubles recognizing himself, now, after seeing Nino’s smile and hearing his voice, when he thought he wasn’t ever going to anymore. It was difficult not to spot the difference when there was this blooming warmth in his chest that wasn’t there before just thinking about seeing Nino again, soon, and he knew that it was anticipation combined with something else he’d rather not think about right now, but it was there just the same.
He heaved a sigh and leaned back on the couch, closing his eyes. He knew he had no right to feel this way, but he couldn’t help it, couldn’t turn it off, despite knowing that he was betraying someone else’s trust by doing so.
He couldn’t - not when he honestly felt so alive for the first time in so long, as if finding out that Nino was alive was all he needed to be revived. He didn’t know how to phrase his feelings into words but seeing Nino laugh on that video had not only brought all the pain of losing Nino back into the surface, but for the first time in like, ever, it brought something else back with it.
His heart.
It was a gift Ohno had not been expecting at all, but he was glad for it. How Aiba-chan had literally handed over Ohno’s heart he thought he’d already lost, when Nino died in his arms the moment Aiba-chan told him that, in fact, Nino didn’t.
But then reality had to come in to spoil the fun, by literally slapping him in the face by reminding him that things were different now. Because when he was two seconds away from dropping everything off to see Nino, he was swiftly reminded that he couldn’t.
It wasn’t going to be easy, but Ohno figured that nothing about all this was easy to begin with, anyway.
He guessed he’d just have to see where this road would lead him - them. After all, fate couldn’t be all that cruel for taking away what was his, only to give it back when Ohno had given up all hopes in getting it back again.
But then again, how was he supposed to do that knowing that he would surely end up hurting someone no matter who he chose? Could he even live peacefully knowing that he’d deliberately chose to hurt that person just to be happy?
Would he even dare?
He had no idea either, but no matter the complication, he would still choose to be confronted with that and more knowing that Nino is alive and well.
He could live just fine with that.
++
Aiba blinked down at Nino swallowed hard, mentally chastising himself for being so careless.
“W-Who?”
Nino smirked, before pushing himself into a sitting position without breaking their gazes. To his peripheral, he was well aware of Kazuko-san’s movements stilling as well.
“You heard me, Aiba-shi.” Nino said. Aiba pursed his lips as he racked his brain for something, anything, an excuse or other to distract Nino, but knowing his best friend, Aiba was certain anything he would come up with would only end up sounding like a lie.
Still, it wouldn’t hurt to try. Not that he’d intended to keep lying to Nino, but knowing his condition, it was better to keep those ‘heartbreaking’ stuff for later. At least until he was certain Nino was healthy enough to accept them as they were, without him ending up hurting Nino unintentionally.
“Nino-chan -”
Nino held a hand up, cutting him off. “Enough with the evasion, Aiba-shi,” Nino said, eyes darting towards the opposite side of the room where Nino’s mother was still busying herself with the garbage.
“You mentioned someone, Oh-chan, right? So, who’s she?” Nino said, curiosity evident in the tone of his voice. “And why does it feel like I know this person even though I cannot remember her?”
Aiba breathed through his nose and felt that now too-familiar ache throbbing away in his chest, seeing the confusion painted through Nino’s eyes. He tilted his head and forced a smile, reaching over to touch Nino’s cheek, soft and almost tentative.
“O-Oh-chan’s a guy and he is your - your o-other best friend f-from University,” Aiba said, the lie tasted bitter in his tongue. Nino’s frown deepened, and something in Aiba’s chest tighten yet again at the sight.
“H-He’d only been informed about y-your - y-your condition this morning and he badly wanted to be here, to see you, but there was something extremely important he had to attend to first. B-But he promised to be here as soon as he possibly can.”
Nino blinked, looking slightly unconvinced. Aiba tried his best to look unaffected, despite the fact that he could feel his heart beating a mile a minute. Trust Nino to still have that ability to read people despite losing most of his memories.
“I still feel like you’re lying but, okay,” Nino muttered, scowling, that Aiba couldn’t help but chuckle in return. Odd, but Nino’s mannerisms stayed the same despite spending the last six years unconscious, and Aiba couldn’t not be amazed seeing them upclose like this again.
“It’s not like there’s much I can do about it, anyway, so, whatever.”
Aiba grinned, couldn’t not. “Why would I even lie to you, hmm?” he countered, mock-punching Nino on the chin. “I wouldn’t ever, what kind of friend do you even think I am?”
“A bad one,” Nino shot back, amused. “Come on, help me up. My bladder’s killing me.”
Aiba shook his head, grinning despite himself as he scooted closer to help Nino up and off the bed, only vaguely aware of Kazuko-san opening the door probably to take the garbage out. She didn’t even contribute to the conversation, and Aiba was certain it was done deliberately, knowing her desire to keep Ohno out of Nino’s life if she could help it.
Aiba sighed, knowing he couldn’t do anything to change her mind. He’d just have to trust that he didn’t have to, because someday, soon, Nino would have recovered his memories on his own, and they no longer have to decide things for him the way they’re all doing now.
He wrapped an arm around Nino’s waist and pressed a quick kiss to Nino’s hair.
“Yes boss.”
++
Jun hadn’t meant to leave the bedroom, but his head was killing him and he didn’t know where Ohno had put his medications. He also couldn’t find his phone, and the last thing he could remember was Ohno answering Sakurai-Sensei’s call earlier, so he was certain Ohno knew where he’d phone had gone, too.
His body ached in all the places that count, and Jun wondered if there really wasn’t anything he should be worried about. He was certain that the ache around the general vicinity of his heart didn’t have anything to do with the accident, but who the hell knew?
He found Ohno lying motionless on the couch, his arms beneath his head, using them as a pillow. But he wasn’t asleep, because the moment he saw Jun step out of the bedroom, he stood. The ache in Jun’s chest doubled, but he did his best not to let it show. Fingers balled into fists, he inclined his head towards Ohno and watched the way Ohno stumbled on his feet, looking Jun over.
“Jun? Are you - Y-You need anything?”
Jun groaned inwardly, finding the gesture to be a little too - exaggerated, pretentious even. He swallowed the urge to call Ohno out on it and instead settled on pointing at his bandaged forehead, feeling the prickle of pain divert into something else. His fingertips tingle, and the heat forming at the center of his chest bloomed to life at the sight.
“My head hurts,” he mumbled drily, “and I can’t find my meds. Do you know where they are?”
“Oh, I’ve put them on the counter, hold on, I’ll get them for you.”
Ohno literally stumbled to get them, as Jun watched him disappear towards the direction of the kitchen. When he came back, he didn’t even bring the medicines with him, he had a bottle of water on his other hand, too.
It was all too amusing, watching Ohno - the way he was deliberately doing all of this for show, probably thinking he was doing Jun a favor by acting like an over-attentive boyfriend after Jun’s accident. Guilty, maybe? Jun wanted to laugh out loud and tell Ohno to quit with the pretenses, because, god, Jun was not that stupid not to notice it.
He’d been stupid for so long for actually pretending not to notice, and god knew he’d rather kill himself now than to keep doing it, knowing he was only going to keep hurting himself in the process.
He’d made a decision, one that he should have done so a long time ago, and this time, he was certain he was going to do it for himself and himself alone. He had to.
“Here,” Ohno said, “Um, are you hungry? I mean, I could go buy you something to eat or -”
Jun shook his head and took them all without another word, before he remembered something.
“What about my phone?” he asked. “I’d like to call my doctor back, if you don’t mind.”
Ohno stared at him for a moment, before he dropped his gaze and nodded.
“Yes, yes, of course,” Ohno said, and promptly turned back around. “I’ve already charged it, so, yeah, here you go.” Ohno added when he was close enough to hand Jun’s phone over, and Jun accepting it with a slight nod of his head.
“Thank you.” managed Jun, turning around and heading towards the direction of the bedroom without bothering glancing back.
++
When he got there, Ninomiya was awake and Aiba-san was with him. And if the lack of Kazuko-san surprised him, the sight of Ninomiya walking around the room with Aiba-san supporting him equally did.
“Oh, Sensei, hello,” Ninomiya waved from where he had one of his arms thrown over Aiba-san’s shoulders for support, panting with exertion and smiling. It should not be reason enough for Sho’s heart to be behaving like it was tap-dancing inside his chest, but it surely felt like it.
Ninomiya’s smile was a wondrous thing, and Sho didn’t have the balls to deny that fact, either.
“Ninomiya-san, your rehabilitation starts the week after this, so, please don’t strain yourself too hard before it. It could be bad for you, you know?” he said, knew that he sounded mildly reproachful though he was still smiling.
“Ah, Sensei, sorry, it was my fault!” Aiba-san apologized quickly, arms branding around Ninomiya’s waist to steady him, before slowly backing Ninomiya to the bed. Sho noticed the action and interpreted the action to be anything but protective, despite the fact that the action seemed far gentler than Sho would have anticipated.
“I helped Nino-chan to the bathroom and I thought it would be better for him to walk around for a bit.”
Sho nodded. “I understand your concerns, Aiba-san, but there’s a reason we have scheduled Ninomiya-san’s rehabilitation to a specific date, okay? Physical exertion could very well result into unforeseen injuries if we’re not careful.”
“Gotcha!” Aiba-san returned with a rather boyish sort-of grin that made Sho smile in answer despite himself.
“So, it’s true? I can go home already?” Ninomiya asked, sounding and looking thrilled. Sho nodded.
“I believe so, yes,” Sho returned, forcing his voice to sound cheerful. He found it difficult to do the same when he was feeling anything but. “Tomorrow before lunch, at the most. I’m certain your mother had your discharge papers ready, so, congratulations.”
“Wow, okay. That’s great. I mean, wow.” Ninomiya exclaimed, clearly unsure of what to say.
Sho knew he had no reason to be sad because he’d be seeing Ninomiya again anyway, but there it was, blooming hotly in his chest as he stared Ninomiya over. He opened his mouth to say something again when his vibrating phone made its presence known, at the same time the door to Ninomiya’s hospital room opened abruptly, and behind it, a woman resembling Ninomiya’s eyes and mouth dashed in.
“Oh. My. God. Oh my fucking god. Oh my, it’s really you. It’s my really my brother, oh my god - KAZU!” the woman yelled and dashed forward, throwing herself to Ninomiya on the bed before the man who came in after her had managed to stop her.
Sho took that as his cue to leave, nodding at Kazuko-san who went inside after the couple, her eyes visibly wet.
“Hello?” he greeted the caller, once he was outside.
Sensei, hi. It’s me.
“Jun-san?” Sho frowned, automatically detecting Jun-san’s distress despite the static noise. He started walking and kept his phone firmly plastered against his ear. “Oh, thank goodness you called! I mean, I tried calling you earlier but someone else answered and he said you’ve been in an accident, are you okay?”
Uh, well, not really, but at least I’m not dead?
Sho felt his pulse kicked when he heard that. “Jun-san, don’t joke about that, okay? It’s not funny.”
There was a pause, before Sho heard Jun-san’s soft laughter from the other end.
Fine, I’m sorry. I just - never mind. I just called to inform you that I’m okay and that I forgot to go back to take the schedule from Kiko-san.
Sho grinned. “Yeah, she told me,” he said, “Would you like me to tell her to just email the schedule to you? I think she has your mail address anyway.”
Ah, no… Jun-san countered quickly, and for a moment there, Sho wondered whether Jun-san did change his mind about accepting Sho as his doctor. But Jun-san was quick to remedy that by saying, I was actually thinking of dropping by there to get the schedule myself. If it’s okay, of course.
Sho found himself exhaling a sigh of relief and smiling. “Are you sure? I mean, don’t you need to rest or something?”
I’m fine. The doctor just gave me medications for the pain, so, it’s good. I’m good, don’t worry about it. I just. I’d like to - to go out for a bit. Walk around. Distract myself, if you know what I’m saying. So, can I drop by there?
“I have a better idea, Jun-san,” he said, deciding on this matter spot on knowing that he needed it, to take his mind off of things and also to make sure Jun-san was okay. And what better way to do that than to see Jun-san with his own two eyes, of course.
“Why don’t I meet you somewhere where we could have dinner instead? I mean, if you’re free, that is. I’ll bring the schedule with me.”
There’s an ever longer pause before Sho heard Jun-san say, I know a place. I’ll send you the address of the restaurant in a bit, yeah?
“Yes, please.” Sho said, and didn’t hang up until Jun-san agreed and ended the call himself first.
Pairing : Ohno/Jun, Sho/Nino, Ohno/Nino, Eventual Jun/?
Rating : R
Summary : Before Jun, there was only Nino. The man Ohno loved with everything he had, loved with such ferocity that any other emotion would pale in comparison. He was Ohno's everything, the love of his life, the person Ohno dreamed of sharing his whole life with someday. Until Nino's untimely death, six years ago.
Disclaimer : fiction, yo!
Warning : Angst in large doses. Memory loss. Minor character death. One-sided love.
“W-What - H-How did you even -” Ohno stuttered, eyes wide in shock, and Jun laughed, loud and mirthless, found himself momentarily gloating at the sight, but it was only short-lived. The pain of Ohno’s betrayal registered soon after, as he took a step back, shaking as he watched Ohno stumbled back up on his feet with just the slightest bit of difficulty.
“Know that your ex is alive?” he cut in, his voice tinged with contempt. “You won’t believe it even if I tell you,” he added, mouth twitching. “But just so you know, it was pure coincidence. I guess someone up there took pity on me and had decided it was high time I realize how foolish I’ve been for hoping that you and I will -” he paused and shook his head, willing the words out despite the difficulty.
He breathed through his nose and willed himself to proceed.
“Well, I guess I was wrong.” he finished, taking another step back when Ohno countered the motion by walking forward, hand stretched.
“Jun, listen, you got this all wrong,” Ohno said, “I mean, I had no idea either! I was as surprised as you are, I swear! If it wasn’t for Aiba-chan -”
“Oh, so now you’re lying,” Jun gritted, “if you think you can fool me again by doing so, you’re terribly mistaken, Satoshi.” he added, tasting bile on his tongue.
Ohno seemed to have recovered himself when Jun started to turn away, catching him by his elbow and tugging him around.
“Jun, please! Won’t you hear me out? I told you, you’ve got this all wrong! I had no idea Kazu was alive, for fuck’s sake! Because if I did, I swear to you, we wouldn’t be here arguing over this! There was no way -” Ohno half-yelled, then probably realized the implication of what he just said so he stopped, but it was too late.
Jun’s heard enough.
“Of course, you wouldn’t, I get it,” he murmured, roughly tugging his arm away from Ohno’s vice-like grip. “There was no way you’d end up stuck here with me if you knew he was alive, right? Well, that’s just too bad, Satoshi.”
“God, are you even listening to me, Jun? Fuck, you’re twisting everything I’m saying into something awful and I swear I don’t even know how to phrase myself properly anymore! I don’t even know how to explain myself without you judging me in every turn! God!”
Jun huffed, his whole body throbbing with pain, from inside out. Somehow, this argument itself couldn’t even compare to the painful ordeal he’d went through earlier, when he crashed his car and wondered if he was going to die.
“I’ve got no strength left in me to indulge you and your lies, Satoshi,” he rasped, exhaustion settling over his bones. All the fight left him and the only thing he wanted now was to lie down and sleep this off, hoping that by the time he woke up, things had gone back to how they were before.
“Do whatever you want, I don’t care anymore. I’m tired. I’m just so tired.” he followed, leaving no room for Ohno to reply as he walked towards the bedroom, stepped inside and locked the door behind him.
+
Sho paced around in his office, his phone in hand and feeling quite distressed over the fact that Jun-san hadn’t called yet.
The person on the other end had said he would pass the message to Jun-san after all, so Sho had been expecting Jun-san’s call, but still no luck. Almost an hour passed and yet Sho’s phone remained quiet, and Sho didn’t want to admit that he was getting increasingly worried with every second that ticked by.
It was difficult to convince himself that nothing was wrong, especially after the man who answered Jun-san’s phone had told him Jun-san was involved in an accident. He knew that worrying wouldn’t help much, but he guessed that was just to be expected, given his history as a doctor.
He chuckled to himself and decided to distract himself for now. After all, he could always call Jun-san back himself, in a few hours at least, if he still didn’t receive one from the other man.
He’d go and check in with Ninomiya-san for now, already found himself in a better mood with his decision, as he headed for the door but not before making sure he’d got his phone safely tucked into the pockets of his pants, just to be safe.
+
Ohno didn’t think it would all come to this.
He watched, helpless, as Jun retreated to the bedroom to seclude himself, his pain evident in the way he’d regarded Ohno with smiles that didn’t quite reach his eyes. Ohno didn’t know what else to do, to say, to make Jun understand that he was as shocked at the revelation as Jun was, because it was clear that Jun was hurt beyond comprehension that he couldn’t think clearly.
Ohno would have wanted to explain his side, but what good would it do if Jun had already made up his mind about all this? About him?
He groaned mentally as he cradled his head in his hands, and willed it all away . It didn’t, because there was no escaping the fact that he was at fault here, too. Probably more than he’d dared to admit. He’d hurt Jun by saying the things he did, for doing the things he did, for not giving Jun the love he deserved, because he was an idiot.
An idiot who was obviously still in love with the same person he thought had died six years ago.
God, but what were the odds? He’d never, not even once since Nino’s apparent death, allowed himself the luxury to even imagine what could his life be if Nino was alive, because it was painful, just thinking about it. He’d often catch himself remembering Nino and the first thing he would do was to stray away from it as much as he could.
Doing so had kept him from going insane, and by then, he thought that it was pretty effective. The years had dulled the pain, yes, but it was still there, lying dormant underneath everything he’d chosen to pile above it, just so he wouldn’t have to confront it again.
At least until now.
He was given no other choice, after all. And it was honestly difficult not to feel elated hearing the news straight from Aiba-chan’s lips, even before he’d seen the photos and videos. The truth was, during that moment, he’d forgotten himself - his present, as he allowed himself to be brought back to the past. The past where there was only Nino.
For a moment there, he’d completely forgotten about Jun.
Saying that he was surprised was understatement. Discovering that the love of his life he thought had died had been alive all this time sure left an impact, one that would certainly trigger life-altering changes to Ohno from here on, and that there was absolutely nothing he could do to stop it.
He knew, because he was already having troubles recognizing himself, now, after seeing Nino’s smile and hearing his voice, when he thought he wasn’t ever going to anymore. It was difficult not to spot the difference when there was this blooming warmth in his chest that wasn’t there before just thinking about seeing Nino again, soon, and he knew that it was anticipation combined with something else he’d rather not think about right now, but it was there just the same.
He heaved a sigh and leaned back on the couch, closing his eyes. He knew he had no right to feel this way, but he couldn’t help it, couldn’t turn it off, despite knowing that he was betraying someone else’s trust by doing so.
He couldn’t - not when he honestly felt so alive for the first time in so long, as if finding out that Nino was alive was all he needed to be revived. He didn’t know how to phrase his feelings into words but seeing Nino laugh on that video had not only brought all the pain of losing Nino back into the surface, but for the first time in like, ever, it brought something else back with it.
His heart.
It was a gift Ohno had not been expecting at all, but he was glad for it. How Aiba-chan had literally handed over Ohno’s heart he thought he’d already lost, when Nino died in his arms the moment Aiba-chan told him that, in fact, Nino didn’t.
But then reality had to come in to spoil the fun, by literally slapping him in the face by reminding him that things were different now. Because when he was two seconds away from dropping everything off to see Nino, he was swiftly reminded that he couldn’t.
It wasn’t going to be easy, but Ohno figured that nothing about all this was easy to begin with, anyway.
He guessed he’d just have to see where this road would lead him - them. After all, fate couldn’t be all that cruel for taking away what was his, only to give it back when Ohno had given up all hopes in getting it back again.
But then again, how was he supposed to do that knowing that he would surely end up hurting someone no matter who he chose? Could he even live peacefully knowing that he’d deliberately chose to hurt that person just to be happy?
Would he even dare?
He had no idea either, but no matter the complication, he would still choose to be confronted with that and more knowing that Nino is alive and well.
He could live just fine with that.
++
Aiba blinked down at Nino swallowed hard, mentally chastising himself for being so careless.
“W-Who?”
Nino smirked, before pushing himself into a sitting position without breaking their gazes. To his peripheral, he was well aware of Kazuko-san’s movements stilling as well.
“You heard me, Aiba-shi.” Nino said. Aiba pursed his lips as he racked his brain for something, anything, an excuse or other to distract Nino, but knowing his best friend, Aiba was certain anything he would come up with would only end up sounding like a lie.
Still, it wouldn’t hurt to try. Not that he’d intended to keep lying to Nino, but knowing his condition, it was better to keep those ‘heartbreaking’ stuff for later. At least until he was certain Nino was healthy enough to accept them as they were, without him ending up hurting Nino unintentionally.
“Nino-chan -”
Nino held a hand up, cutting him off. “Enough with the evasion, Aiba-shi,” Nino said, eyes darting towards the opposite side of the room where Nino’s mother was still busying herself with the garbage.
“You mentioned someone, Oh-chan, right? So, who’s she?” Nino said, curiosity evident in the tone of his voice. “And why does it feel like I know this person even though I cannot remember her?”
Aiba breathed through his nose and felt that now too-familiar ache throbbing away in his chest, seeing the confusion painted through Nino’s eyes. He tilted his head and forced a smile, reaching over to touch Nino’s cheek, soft and almost tentative.
“O-Oh-chan’s a guy and he is your - your o-other best friend f-from University,” Aiba said, the lie tasted bitter in his tongue. Nino’s frown deepened, and something in Aiba’s chest tighten yet again at the sight.
“H-He’d only been informed about y-your - y-your condition this morning and he badly wanted to be here, to see you, but there was something extremely important he had to attend to first. B-But he promised to be here as soon as he possibly can.”
Nino blinked, looking slightly unconvinced. Aiba tried his best to look unaffected, despite the fact that he could feel his heart beating a mile a minute. Trust Nino to still have that ability to read people despite losing most of his memories.
“I still feel like you’re lying but, okay,” Nino muttered, scowling, that Aiba couldn’t help but chuckle in return. Odd, but Nino’s mannerisms stayed the same despite spending the last six years unconscious, and Aiba couldn’t not be amazed seeing them upclose like this again.
“It’s not like there’s much I can do about it, anyway, so, whatever.”
Aiba grinned, couldn’t not. “Why would I even lie to you, hmm?” he countered, mock-punching Nino on the chin. “I wouldn’t ever, what kind of friend do you even think I am?”
“A bad one,” Nino shot back, amused. “Come on, help me up. My bladder’s killing me.”
Aiba shook his head, grinning despite himself as he scooted closer to help Nino up and off the bed, only vaguely aware of Kazuko-san opening the door probably to take the garbage out. She didn’t even contribute to the conversation, and Aiba was certain it was done deliberately, knowing her desire to keep Ohno out of Nino’s life if she could help it.
Aiba sighed, knowing he couldn’t do anything to change her mind. He’d just have to trust that he didn’t have to, because someday, soon, Nino would have recovered his memories on his own, and they no longer have to decide things for him the way they’re all doing now.
He wrapped an arm around Nino’s waist and pressed a quick kiss to Nino’s hair.
“Yes boss.”
++
Jun hadn’t meant to leave the bedroom, but his head was killing him and he didn’t know where Ohno had put his medications. He also couldn’t find his phone, and the last thing he could remember was Ohno answering Sakurai-Sensei’s call earlier, so he was certain Ohno knew where he’d phone had gone, too.
His body ached in all the places that count, and Jun wondered if there really wasn’t anything he should be worried about. He was certain that the ache around the general vicinity of his heart didn’t have anything to do with the accident, but who the hell knew?
He found Ohno lying motionless on the couch, his arms beneath his head, using them as a pillow. But he wasn’t asleep, because the moment he saw Jun step out of the bedroom, he stood. The ache in Jun’s chest doubled, but he did his best not to let it show. Fingers balled into fists, he inclined his head towards Ohno and watched the way Ohno stumbled on his feet, looking Jun over.
“Jun? Are you - Y-You need anything?”
Jun groaned inwardly, finding the gesture to be a little too - exaggerated, pretentious even. He swallowed the urge to call Ohno out on it and instead settled on pointing at his bandaged forehead, feeling the prickle of pain divert into something else. His fingertips tingle, and the heat forming at the center of his chest bloomed to life at the sight.
“My head hurts,” he mumbled drily, “and I can’t find my meds. Do you know where they are?”
“Oh, I’ve put them on the counter, hold on, I’ll get them for you.”
Ohno literally stumbled to get them, as Jun watched him disappear towards the direction of the kitchen. When he came back, he didn’t even bring the medicines with him, he had a bottle of water on his other hand, too.
It was all too amusing, watching Ohno - the way he was deliberately doing all of this for show, probably thinking he was doing Jun a favor by acting like an over-attentive boyfriend after Jun’s accident. Guilty, maybe? Jun wanted to laugh out loud and tell Ohno to quit with the pretenses, because, god, Jun was not that stupid not to notice it.
He’d been stupid for so long for actually pretending not to notice, and god knew he’d rather kill himself now than to keep doing it, knowing he was only going to keep hurting himself in the process.
He’d made a decision, one that he should have done so a long time ago, and this time, he was certain he was going to do it for himself and himself alone. He had to.
“Here,” Ohno said, “Um, are you hungry? I mean, I could go buy you something to eat or -”
Jun shook his head and took them all without another word, before he remembered something.
“What about my phone?” he asked. “I’d like to call my doctor back, if you don’t mind.”
Ohno stared at him for a moment, before he dropped his gaze and nodded.
“Yes, yes, of course,” Ohno said, and promptly turned back around. “I’ve already charged it, so, yeah, here you go.” Ohno added when he was close enough to hand Jun’s phone over, and Jun accepting it with a slight nod of his head.
“Thank you.” managed Jun, turning around and heading towards the direction of the bedroom without bothering glancing back.
++
When he got there, Ninomiya was awake and Aiba-san was with him. And if the lack of Kazuko-san surprised him, the sight of Ninomiya walking around the room with Aiba-san supporting him equally did.
“Oh, Sensei, hello,” Ninomiya waved from where he had one of his arms thrown over Aiba-san’s shoulders for support, panting with exertion and smiling. It should not be reason enough for Sho’s heart to be behaving like it was tap-dancing inside his chest, but it surely felt like it.
Ninomiya’s smile was a wondrous thing, and Sho didn’t have the balls to deny that fact, either.
“Ninomiya-san, your rehabilitation starts the week after this, so, please don’t strain yourself too hard before it. It could be bad for you, you know?” he said, knew that he sounded mildly reproachful though he was still smiling.
“Ah, Sensei, sorry, it was my fault!” Aiba-san apologized quickly, arms branding around Ninomiya’s waist to steady him, before slowly backing Ninomiya to the bed. Sho noticed the action and interpreted the action to be anything but protective, despite the fact that the action seemed far gentler than Sho would have anticipated.
“I helped Nino-chan to the bathroom and I thought it would be better for him to walk around for a bit.”
Sho nodded. “I understand your concerns, Aiba-san, but there’s a reason we have scheduled Ninomiya-san’s rehabilitation to a specific date, okay? Physical exertion could very well result into unforeseen injuries if we’re not careful.”
“Gotcha!” Aiba-san returned with a rather boyish sort-of grin that made Sho smile in answer despite himself.
“So, it’s true? I can go home already?” Ninomiya asked, sounding and looking thrilled. Sho nodded.
“I believe so, yes,” Sho returned, forcing his voice to sound cheerful. He found it difficult to do the same when he was feeling anything but. “Tomorrow before lunch, at the most. I’m certain your mother had your discharge papers ready, so, congratulations.”
“Wow, okay. That’s great. I mean, wow.” Ninomiya exclaimed, clearly unsure of what to say.
Sho knew he had no reason to be sad because he’d be seeing Ninomiya again anyway, but there it was, blooming hotly in his chest as he stared Ninomiya over. He opened his mouth to say something again when his vibrating phone made its presence known, at the same time the door to Ninomiya’s hospital room opened abruptly, and behind it, a woman resembling Ninomiya’s eyes and mouth dashed in.
“Oh. My. God. Oh my fucking god. Oh my, it’s really you. It’s my really my brother, oh my god - KAZU!” the woman yelled and dashed forward, throwing herself to Ninomiya on the bed before the man who came in after her had managed to stop her.
Sho took that as his cue to leave, nodding at Kazuko-san who went inside after the couple, her eyes visibly wet.
“Hello?” he greeted the caller, once he was outside.
Sensei, hi. It’s me.
“Jun-san?” Sho frowned, automatically detecting Jun-san’s distress despite the static noise. He started walking and kept his phone firmly plastered against his ear. “Oh, thank goodness you called! I mean, I tried calling you earlier but someone else answered and he said you’ve been in an accident, are you okay?”
Uh, well, not really, but at least I’m not dead?
Sho felt his pulse kicked when he heard that. “Jun-san, don’t joke about that, okay? It’s not funny.”
There was a pause, before Sho heard Jun-san’s soft laughter from the other end.
Fine, I’m sorry. I just - never mind. I just called to inform you that I’m okay and that I forgot to go back to take the schedule from Kiko-san.
Sho grinned. “Yeah, she told me,” he said, “Would you like me to tell her to just email the schedule to you? I think she has your mail address anyway.”
Ah, no… Jun-san countered quickly, and for a moment there, Sho wondered whether Jun-san did change his mind about accepting Sho as his doctor. But Jun-san was quick to remedy that by saying, I was actually thinking of dropping by there to get the schedule myself. If it’s okay, of course.
Sho found himself exhaling a sigh of relief and smiling. “Are you sure? I mean, don’t you need to rest or something?”
I’m fine. The doctor just gave me medications for the pain, so, it’s good. I’m good, don’t worry about it. I just. I’d like to - to go out for a bit. Walk around. Distract myself, if you know what I’m saying. So, can I drop by there?
“I have a better idea, Jun-san,” he said, deciding on this matter spot on knowing that he needed it, to take his mind off of things and also to make sure Jun-san was okay. And what better way to do that than to see Jun-san with his own two eyes, of course.
“Why don’t I meet you somewhere where we could have dinner instead? I mean, if you’re free, that is. I’ll bring the schedule with me.”
There’s an ever longer pause before Sho heard Jun-san say, I know a place. I’ll send you the address of the restaurant in a bit, yeah?
“Yes, please.” Sho said, and didn’t hang up until Jun-san agreed and ended the call himself first.
